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thought by some people that it is better to plant more trees instead of building more houses. From my

It is thought by some people that it is better to plant more trees instead of building more houses. From my perspective, building houses do increase the living standards of people but it comes with a cost that we need to pay in the form of pollution. To begin with, firstly planting abundant trees helps in lowering the greenhouse effect which ultimately leads to decrease in pollution. Change in climate, lowering of water level, ecological imbalance, deforestation, acid rain and others are all effects of greenhouse which can be cured with planting of trees. Secondly, Some cities are seeing increased cases of asthma, eyes pain and migraine because people are breathing more carbon dioxide present in the air. Trees can consume carbon dioxide from the air which can increase the percentage of oxygen and decrease the carbon dioxide. Thirdly, people are getting deprived of getting fresh air which is resulting in many deaths. Lastly, humans has already consumed abundance of resources of earth and we should return the favour by keeping the earth green and safe. On the contrary, building houses do help needy people in getting their own house. More housing leads to lower cost of houses with which people having lower income can also buy. Also, government is also providing many schemes with lower interest to help needy people. To recapitulate, planting trees is very important for human survival and should not be ignored at any cost as there will be a time when people will be buying oxygen instead of house to survive.
It is
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thought
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
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people
that it is better to plant more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
instead
of building more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
. From my perspective, building
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
do increase the living standards of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
with a cost that we need to pay in the form of pollution.

To
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begin
with,
firstly
planting abundant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
in lowering the greenhouse effect which
ultimately
leads to decrease in pollution.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Change
in climate, lowering of water level, ecological imbalance, deforestation, acid rain
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
and others
are all effects of greenhouse which can
be cured
with planting of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
cities are seeing increased cases of asthma, eyes pain and migraine
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are breathing more carbon dioxide present in the air.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Trees
can consume carbon dioxide from the air which can increase the percentage of oxygen and decrease the carbon dioxide.
Thirdly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are getting deprived of getting fresh air which is resulting in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
deaths.
Lastly
, humans has already consumed abundance of resources of
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
earth and
we should return the
Possible spelling mistake. ‘favour’ is British English.
favour
by keeping the earth green and safe.

On the contrary
, building
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
do
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help
needy
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people
in getting their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
. More housing leads to lower cost of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
with which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
having lower income can
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
.
Also
,
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government
is
also
providing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
schemes with lower interest to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
needy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

To recapitulate, planting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for human survival and should not be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignored
at any cost as there will be a time when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will be buying oxygen
instead
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
to survive.

IELTS essay thought by some people that it is better to plant more trees instead of building more houses. From my

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
256 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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