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this summer your fr intends to find a part time job. What job will you suggest her : a shop assistant in a clothes store, a tutor or a tour guide?

this summer your fr intends to find a part time job. What job will you suggest her: a shop assistant in a clothes store, a tutor or a tour guide? Y2gej
My friend is about to find a part time job this summer. There are 3 options: a shop assistant in a clothes store, a tutor and a tour guide. I think becoming a tour guide is her best choice due to the following reasons. Being a tour guide is an opportunity to travel long distances, get to know more about all the monuments, historic sites of Vietnam. Moreover, in order to be a tour guide, my friend has to have in-depth knowledge of history and geography so it can also be a chance to study intensively. Besides, her soft skills such as communication or handling situations will be enhanced. Lastly, she can expand her relationships as she will go to many places and make many friends. The reason I don’t think being a shop assistant will suit her is because it is a boring job. She will have to stand all day and may have to cope up with difficult guests. The salary is also unstable due to her sales. I know she wouldn't want to be a tutor because she once told me that job is really stressful. Being a tutor required patience, high qualification and teaching experience in order to affect student learning in a good way. And due to the boring nature of work, my friend who is very energetic won’t choose it. In conclusion, the best part-time job for my friend this summer is being a tour guide.
My
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
is about to find a
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
part time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
this summer. There are 3 options: a shop assistant in a clothes store, a tutor and a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tour
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
guide
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
becoming a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tour
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
guide
is her best choice due to the following reasons.

Being a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tour
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
guide
is an opportunity to travel long distances,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to know more about all the monuments, historic sites of Vietnam.
Moreover
, in order to be a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tour
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
guide
, my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
have in-depth knowledge of history and geography
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it can
also
be a chance to study
intensively
.
Besides
, her soft
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
such as communication or handling situations will
be enhanced
.
Lastly
, she can expand her relationships as she will go to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
places and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
friends.

The reason I don’t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
being a shop assistant will suit her is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is a boring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
. She will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
stand all day and may
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
cope up with difficult guests. The salary is
also
unstable due to her sales.

I know she wouldn't want to be a tutor
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
she once
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
me that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
is
really
stressful. Being a tutor required patience, high qualification and teaching experience in order to affect student learning in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
way. And due to the boring nature of work, my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
who is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
energetic won’t choose it.

In conclusion
, the best part-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
for my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
this summer is being a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tour
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
guide
.
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IELTS essay this summer your fr intends to find a part time job. What job will you suggest her: a shop assistant in a clothes store, a tutor or a tour guide?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
242 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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