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These days more fathers try at home and take care of their children while others go out to work but could be the reasons for this do you think it is a positive or a negative development

With the socioeconomic development, the trend of bread earner fathers and housewives have declined with the introduction of new fashion in which males nurture their pupils and females go out for doing job. In the following paragraphs, I would shed light on significant causes behind this along with my own opinion and thus will lead to a logical conclusion. To commence with the reason, the first and foremost is socially acceptable belief. Since the gender difference has mitigated, females are able to get equal opportunity in every field. Along with this, they also get more money as compared to his partner and it is apparent that money is quite indispensable to attain anything. Thus, with mutual decision, both couple decide to choose ladies to do work over gents. Secondly, working hours of a girl in organizations are fewer than boys. To be more precise, there are manifold companies in which the working hours of a lady are only 8 hours, whilst boys ought to work for 9 to 10 hours. Hence, due to aforementioned reasons this trend has enlarged. Furthermore, I admit that it is a beneficial influence on society with the introduction of multifarious benefits. The most preponderant is that, upbringing under father would make a child more confident and stronger. Kids can acquire insight about how to face difficulties in their lives. The another pivotal effect is that it would embrace the opportunity for ladies. As we know, in the past, whether a girl educated or not, she did not send to work, On the other hand now a girl can work in any sector. In conclusion, I believe that changing roles of men and women are due to the development of beliefs, and it is utterly desirable effect on society as well as on children.
With the socioeconomic development, the trend of bread earner fathers and housewives have declined with the introduction of new fashion in which males nurture their pupils and females go out for doing job. In the following paragraphs, I would shed light on significant causes behind this along with my
own
opinion and
thus
will lead to a logical conclusion.

To commence with the reason, the
first
and foremost is
socially
acceptable belief. Since the gender difference has mitigated, females are able to
get
equal opportunity in every field. Along with this, they
also
get
more money as compared to his
partner and
it is apparent that money is quite indispensable to attain anything.
Thus
, with mutual decision, both couple decide to choose ladies to do
work
over gents.
Secondly
, working
hours
of a girl in organizations are fewer than boys. To be more precise, there are manifold
companies
in which the working
hours
of a lady are
only
8
hours
, whilst boys ought to
work
for 9 to 10
hours
.
Hence
, due to aforementioned reasons this trend has enlarged.

Furthermore
, I admit that it is a beneficial influence on society with the introduction of multifarious benefits. The most preponderant is that, upbringing under father would
make
a child more confident and stronger. Kids can acquire insight about how to face difficulties in their
lives
. The another pivotal effect is that it would embrace the opportunity for ladies. As we know, in the past, whether a girl educated or not, she did not
send
to
work
,
On the other hand
now
a girl can
work
in any sector.

In conclusion
, I believe that changing roles of
men
and women are due to the development of beliefs, and it is
utterly
desirable effect on society
as well
as on children.
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IELTS essay These days more fathers try at home and take care of their children while others go out to work but could be the reasons for this do you think it is a positive or a negative development

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
298 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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