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Establishing good relationships in the workplace is not important, as the primary goal of every person is to focus on work. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

On the one hand a number of poaple consider establishing a good relationship at the workplace is not important, because the main focus should be on the work. This relationship might cause to decline in productivity, as they might be distractions. For instance, the colleagues might demand precious time such having lunch together or doing their own business. This might lead to distraction from the original tasks and consequently the productivity might be affected. On the other hand I believe that friendly atmosphere at working place improve the conditions that allow workers meet their goals. The main advantage of establishing good relationship is that one can solve issues extremely faster. For the reason that if one feels confident to talk with his or her colleagues, they can identify what their co-workers' abilities. As a result, it will be easier to ask for help, due to they know who is good in this field. To summarise, I think that the goals at workplace are not the primary thing people have to pay attention at. If a person is in a good environment he is more prone to succeed than who think they ought to consider only work.
On the one hand a number of
Possible spelling mistake found.
poaple
consider establishing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
relationship at the workplace is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the main focus should be on the work. This relationship
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
cause
Did you mean “declining”? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, ‘cause’ + ‘to’ takes an object, usually a pronoun.
to decline
in productivity, as they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
be distractions.
For instance
, the colleagues
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
demand precious time such having lunch together or doing their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
business. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
lead to distraction from the original tasks and
consequently
the productivity
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
.
On the other hand
I believe that friendly atmosphere at working place
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the conditions that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
workers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
their goals. The main advantage of establishing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
relationship is that one can solve issues
extremely
faster. For the reason that if one feels confident to talk with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
his or her
colleagues, they can identify what their co-workers' abilities.
As a result
, it will be easier to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ask for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
, due to they know who is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
in this field. To
Possible spelling mistake. ‘summarise’ is British English.
summarise
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the goals at workplace are not the primary thing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
pay attention at.
“If” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
If
a person is in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
environment he is more prone to succeed than who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
they ought to consider
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
work.
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IELTS essay Establishing good relationships in the workplace is not important, as the primary goal of every person is to focus on work.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
196 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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