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There is no doubt that the period of childhood is the most critical stage in children lives. Many hold that the young must be monitored and under observation during their youth. Although this predication is true to some extent, the old also should not impose harsh rules on children.

There is no doubt that the period of childhood is the most critical stage in children lives. Many hold that the young must be monitored and under observation during their youth. Although this predication is true to some extent, the old also should not impose harsh rules on children. 86amG
There is no doubt that the period of childhood is the most critical stage in children lives. Many hold that the young must be monitored and under observation during their youth. Although this predication is true to some extent, the old also should not impose harsh rules on children. First, the youngster have to be put under notice because they can not distinguish between right and wrong. To illustrate, deeply responsibility of every family is significantly necessary to educate children. In the other words, only parents could know how and what kind attitude of kids towards people. Such basic knowledge would help parents in providing and maintaining good conduct for their children, as a result, such children would be of gentle and great behavior. However, the downside of keeping the children under strict disciplines might cause some unforeseen consequences. For example, teenagers are more likely to do the opposite of what they are told to do simply because they want to be independent. Children should also have rights to exercise their free will and develop their own pattern of behaviors. Strict rules would destroy the individuality of children if they are imposed on them. Another example, comparing the difference in education between Western nations and Asia countries, there has a big gap in tutelage. In Western countries, kids are allowed to live as they wish, consequently, they have better decision-taking power and more self-dependent than the young in Asia. In conclusion, it is clear that children should be guided by rules, but instead of forcing kids by rigorous obedience, youngsters had better be encouraged to express idea and not be restricted in moral standards.
There is no doubt that the period of childhood is the most critical stage in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
hold that the young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be monitored
and under observation during their youth. Although this predication is true to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent, the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
also
should not impose harsh
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
on children.

First
, the youngster
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be put
under notice
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they can not distinguish between right and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
. To illustrate,
deeply
responsibility of every family is
significantly
necessary to educate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. In the other words,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
parents could know how and what kind attitude of kids towards
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. Such basic knowledge would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
parents in providing and maintaining
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
conduct for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
,
as a result
, such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
would be of gentle and great behavior.

However
, the downside of keeping the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
under strict disciplines might cause
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
unforeseen consequences.
For example
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
are more likely to do the opposite of what they are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
to do
simply
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they want to be independent.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
should
also
have rights to exercise their free will and develop their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
pattern of behaviors. Strict
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
the individuality of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
if they
are imposed
on them. Another example, comparing the difference in education between Western nations and Asia countries, there has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
gap in tutelage. In Western countries, kids are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
as they wish,
consequently
, they have better decision-taking power and more self-dependent than the young in Asia.

In conclusion
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should
be guided
by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
instead
of forcing kids by rigorous obedience, youngsters had better
be encouraged
to express
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
and not
be restricted
in moral standards.
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IELTS essay There is no doubt that the period of childhood is the most critical stage in children lives. Many hold that the young must be monitored and under observation during their youth. Although this predication is true to some extent, the old also should not impose harsh rules on children.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
274 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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  • There is no doubt that the period of childhood is the most critical stage in children lives. Many hold that the young must be monitored and under observation during their youth. Although this predication is true to some extent, the old also should not impose harsh rules on children.