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There is an increase in noise in our daily lives what are the causes of this problem and what will be the solutions. v.2

There is an increase in noise in our daily lives what are the causes of this problem and what will be the solutions. v. 2
As mechanical devices play an increasingly more central role in our daily lives, it has been seen that, there has been an unprecedented incline not only in sound, but also in its pollution. It is obvious that, nowadays, there is an extensive noise which is emitting from many devices and moreover, this worrying trend looks set to continue. Industrialization is one of the main culprits to have this situation, from the dawn of this revolution; the sound from machinery is gradually incremented. There are many components that could produce this problem such as; generators, manufacturing industries, power plants and so on. As these mechanical components are old and do not have any suitable sound reduction equipment' s, they produce more noise in general. Furthermore, most of the companies have engines which are often out-of-date; this is another reason to expose loud noise. Even though, there is a raise in sound these days, it would be completely preposterous to not to recognize the advancements in technology that can mitigate this problem. Thanks to it, we can able to shun the sound with latest suppressor technology and compressors which can not only reduce the sound but also pollution caused by it. For instance, The Generation X generators are compatible with latest sound reduction technology that will produce far more less sound when compared with its ancestors. One more point worth considering is, the fuel used for these components, instead of using conventional fuel such as diesel, petrol or gas, we can use electricity to suitable engines which can eradicate this problem. These are the ultra-prominent solutions that can decrease the level of sound. Despite that we are surrounded by many machines which make our lives easy, it is always a worry that we are the main reason for raise in noise. It is always a better choice to update the technology that can solve this problem. Although this solution is not completely implemented in all industries, I hope, in near future, it will have its time
As mechanical devices play an
increasingly
more central role in our daily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
, it has been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that, there has been an unprecedented incline not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sound
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
in its pollution. It is obvious that, nowadays, there is an extensive noise which is emitting from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
devices and
moreover
, this worrying trend looks set to continue.

Industrialization is one of the main culprits to have this situation, from the dawn of this revolution; the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sound
from machinery is
gradually
incremented. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
components that could produce this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
such as; generators, manufacturing industries, power plants and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on. As these mechanical components are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
and do not have any suitable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sound
reduction
Possible spelling mistake found.
equipment&
#039; s, they produce more noise
in general
.
Furthermore
, most of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
have engines which are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
out-of-date; this is another reason to expose loud noise.

Even though
, there is a raise in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sound
these days, it would be completely preposterous
One 'to' seems to be obsolete.
to not to
recognize the advancements in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
that can mitigate this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
. Thanks to it, we
Please check whether one of these words is redundant.
can able to
shun the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sound
with
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
suppressor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
and compressors which can not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sound
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
pollution caused by it.
For instance
, The Generation X generators are compatible with
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sound
reduction
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
that will produce far
Use only "less" (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
more less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sound
when compared with its ancestors. One more point worth considering is, the fuel
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for these components,
instead
of using conventional fuel such as diesel, petrol or gas, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
electricity to suitable engines which can eradicate this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
. These are the ultra-prominent solutions that can decrease the level of sound.

Despite that we
are surrounded
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
machines which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
easy, it is always a worry that we are the main reason for raise in noise. It is always a better choice to update the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
that can solve this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
. Although this solution is not completely implemented in all industries, I hope, in near future, it will have its
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
time
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
16Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay There is an increase in noise in our daily lives what are the causes of this problem and what will be the solutions. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
333 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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