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THERE IS A SHORTAGE OF HOUSING IN THE CITY. WHAT ARE THE REASONS FOR THIS AND HOW CAN YOU DO TO SOLVE IT?

THERE IS A SHORTAGE OF HOUSING IN THE CITY. WHAT ARE THE REASONS FOR THIS AND HOW CAN YOU DO TO SOLVE IT? aQnOY
it is true that the demand for housing due to the growth of population and the necessity of having an accommodation for a family is rapid increase in some cities over the world. however, there are fewer and fewer houses for city dwellers. to begin, there are two main reasons why many people do not have proper housing in recent years. the first reason is the increase in the birth rate as well as the longer life expectancy. due to lack of control on delivery and unawareness of people the birth rate is increasing rapidly and after that many issues will arise especially the problem of accommodation. land is a limited resource on earth, so if the birth rate increases and people's life expectancy increases, there won't be enough places to build residential areas for everyone. as a result, a number of people have become homeless in the cities. . the solution is for the government should create better education, making people aware greatly of family planning and city council should develop the city vertically by build more apartments. another reason is the migration of many people from country to city to find job. obviously, accommodations in cities are very expensive so many newcomers cannot rent them at an affordable cost. the first solution is that the city council needs to build more dormitory for employees. by doing it, the homeless would have access to homes with a stable price subsidized by governments. the second measure is revitalizing the economic growth in rural areas in order to create more job opportunities for the locals and decline the migration from the countryside. all things considered, there is a shortage of housing in the city. the reasons are the increase in the birth rate as well as the longer life expectancy and the migration of many people. government the government should create better education and build more apartments. personally, i take the view that the responsibility lies with the government.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
it
is true that the demand for housing due to the growth of population and the necessity of having
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "accommodation".
an accommodation
for a family is rapid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
over the world.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
however
, there are fewer and fewer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
for city dwellers.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
, there are two main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not have proper housing in recent years.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
the
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
birth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
as well
as the longer life expectancy.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
due
to lack of control on delivery and unawareness of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
birth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
is increasing
rapidly
and after that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
issues will arise
especially
the problem of accommodation.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
land
is a limited resource on earth,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
birth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increases
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's life expectancy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increases
, there won't be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
places to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
build
residential areas for everyone.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
as
a result, a number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have become homeless in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
the
solution is for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should create better education, making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
aware
greatly
of family planning and city council should develop the city
vertically
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
build
more apartments.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is the migration of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from country to city to find job.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
obviously
, accommodations in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
expensive
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
newcomers cannot rent them at an affordable cost.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
the
first
solution is that the city council needs to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
build
more dormitory for employees.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
by
doing it, the homeless would have access to homes with a stable price subsidized by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
the
second measure is revitalizing the economic growth in rural areas in order to create more job opportunities for the locals and decline the migration from the countryside.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
all
things considered, there is a shortage of housing in the city.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
are the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
birth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
as well
as the longer life expectancy and the migration of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
government
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should create better education and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
build
more apartments.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
personally
,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
take the view that the responsibility lies with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
.
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IELTS essay THERE IS A SHORTAGE OF HOUSING IN THE CITY. WHAT ARE THE REASONS FOR THIS AND HOW CAN YOU DO TO SOLVE IT?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
328 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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