Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

There are more new towns being built nowadays. It is more important to include public parks and sports facilities than shopping centers for individuals to spend their free time. To what extent do you agree or diagree?

There are more new towns being built nowadays. It is more important to include public parks and sports facilities than shopping centers for individuals to spend their free time. 0oX1
Nowadays, people started constructing buildings whenever they see open space. It is argued that it is more crucial to involve public gardens and sports facilities rather than building commercial complexes to pass spare time. I agree with this given notion and this essay will discuss related aspects in detail. There are several benefits of building public properties rather than constantly constucting shopping malls and all. To begin with, firstly, it helps elder people and toddler, preschooler or children for their physical well-being and social well being. To justify, in modern era, majority of parents of do not have enough time for their children's extra cricular activities as they are swamped in business life. So, if there is a small public garden available at nearby house then it is advantageous for babies. So that, they can spend their time in garden and played number of games, it is useful for their physical health. In addition, they may be able to get some fesh air and feel positive vibes, indirectly it affects positively in their brain or mental health. Furthermore, retired people or senior citizens can also takes the advantages of the public properties such as library, local parks, and so on. To elaborate, nowadays these people tends to sitted at home whole day and felt bored sometimes. But if the garden or library available near their home, then they could go their and either read books, newspaper, magazines or meet some new people at garden and spend their leusire time. Otherwise at home, it might be possible, they fall prey to obesity, depression and realted helath issues. Moreover, having a sport center nearby at one's home as it plays an important role in individual's good phusical helath. In conclusion, personally, I think that, it can be seen more advantageous to have such a public properties like sport centers, public gardens rather than shopping centers. However, it is also necessary to have a shopping center one per area.
Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
constructing buildings whenever they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
open space. It
is argued
that it is more crucial to involve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gardens
and sports facilities
rather
than building commercial complexes to pass spare
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
notion and this essay will discuss related aspects in detail.

There are several benefits of building
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
properties
rather
than
constantly
Possible spelling mistake found.
constucting
shopping malls and all. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
firstly
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
elder
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and toddler, preschooler or children for their physical well-being and social
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well being
. To justify, in modern era,
It seems that an article is missing.
majority of
parents of do not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for their children's extra
Possible spelling mistake found.
cricular
activities as they
are swamped
in business life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, if there is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
garden
available at nearby
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
then it is advantageous for babies.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
that, they can spend their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
garden
and played number of games, it is useful for their physical health.
In addition
, they may be able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Possible spelling mistake found.
fesh
air and feel
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
vibes,
indirectly
it affects
positively
in their brain or mental health.

Furthermore
, retired
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
or senior citizens can
also
takes the advantages of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
properties such as library, local parks, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on. To elaborate, nowadays these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
tends
to
Possible spelling mistake found.
sitted
at home whole day and felt bored
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
garden
or library available near their home, then they could go their and either read books, newspaper, magazines or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
garden
and spend their
Possible spelling mistake found.
leusire
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Otherwise
at home, it might be possible, they fall prey to obesity, depression and
Possible spelling mistake found.
realted
Possible spelling mistake found.
helath
issues.
Moreover
, having a sport center nearby at one's home as it plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in individual's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
Possible spelling mistake found.
phusical
Possible spelling mistake found.
helath
.

In conclusion
,
personally
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
more advantageous to have such a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
properties like sport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
centers
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gardens
rather
than shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
centers
.
However
, it is
also
necessary to have a shopping center one per area.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay There are more new towns being built nowadays. It is more important to include public parks and sports facilities than shopping centers for individuals to spend their free time.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
326 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • There are more new towns being built nowadays. It is more important to include public parks and sports facilities than shopping centers for individuals to spend their free time. To what extent do you agree or diagree?