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There are many types of music in the world today why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important and should it be preserved or in international music that is heard everywhere nowadays more usefull to society?

There are many types of music in the world today why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important and should it be preserved or in international music that is heard everywhere nowadays more usefull to society? Keq6
Music is a part of everyone's life, mostly society love to listen music and play as well, we can be divide music in genres in vary ways such as pop, jazz, rock and folk music. When people feel tired during work the time music take place of energy booster so, many peoples love to listen songs while working. Also, varieties of music have been played in different time and places like humans love to listen jazz music in the early morning and before go to bed to feel calm. Rock and pop music have been play in parties, birthday songs are very popular in birthday and folk song played to preset community and places where they belong. Both the traditional and international music listen by inhabitant majorly in family functions and parties. people demand to play traditional folk music also in parties where youngster like to enjoy international song for dance on beats, traditional music represent community and loyalty. I think it it fair to adopt our traditional music that is represent our culture, religions and everyone likes to listen it.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Music
is a part of everyone's life,
mostly
society
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
listen
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
and play
as well
, we can be divide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
in genres in vary ways such as pop, jazz, rock and folk music.

When
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
feel tired during work the time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
take place of energy booster
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
peoples
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
listen
songs while working.
Also
, varieties of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
have
been played
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
time and places like humans
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
listen
jazz
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
in the early morning and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
go to bed to feel calm. Rock and pop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
have been play in parties, birthday songs are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
popular in birthday and folk song played to preset community and places where they belong.

Both the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
and international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
listen
by inhabitant
majorly
in family functions and parties.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
people
demand to play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
folk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
also
in parties where youngster like to enjoy international song for dance on beats,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
represent community and loyalty.

I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
It seems you either mean "it is", "if it", "it" or there is a comma missing: "it, it".
it it
Did you mean "fairs"?
fair
to adopt our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
that is
Consider using a past participle here: "represented".
represent
our culture, religions and everyone likes to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
listen
it.
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IELTS essay There are many types of music in the world today why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important and should it be preserved or in international music that is heard everywhere nowadays more usefull to society?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
181 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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