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There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the International music that is heard everywhere nowadays? You should write at least 250 words. Use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. v.11

There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the International music that is heard everywhere nowadays? Use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. v. 11
Music is everywhere, it is a necessity of life. It can either be made by nature or created at the hands of man. Humans have been creating and listing to music since the beginning of our race. Why does every region or culture have different type of melody associated with it is something that be debated upon. This essay will focus on the need of sounds pleasant to our ears and compare the different types of it which exist in today’s time. A pleasant rhythmic sound, either being originated from an instrument or from someone’s mouth is termed as music. But it is much more than that, every living creature has its own form of tune which they use to express how they feel. Researches have shown that these sounds not only lift up our mood, but also trigger the release of hormones in our brain, which can save us from depression, sadness and anxiety. Every region is associated to a different genre, which evolved with their culture, history and religion. It absorbed the essence of time and grew along with it. Due to this regional tune are considered to have more depth and emotion as compared to the international ones being listened to these days by the youth. International music, in my opinion is majorly based on latest instruments and technology. Music, be it in any form, songs, instrument sound or a combination of multiple sounds is very crucial in any person’s life. It brings happiness and lighten the day for them, be it regional or international, one should make sure they include one or both of them in their daily life.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Music
is everywhere, it is a necessity of life. It can either
be made
by nature or created at the hands of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
. Humans have been creating and listing to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
since the beginning of our race. Why does every region or culture have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
type of melody associated with it is something that
be debated
upon. This essay will focus on the need of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sounds
pleasant to our ears and compare the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
types of it which exist in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s time.

A pleasant rhythmic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sound
, either
being originated
from an instrument or from someone’s mouth
is termed
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
it is much more than that, every living creature has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
form of tune which they
Make sure that 'use to' is correct. For habitual actions in the past or to mean 'accustomed to', use "used to".
use to
express how they feel. Researches have shown that these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sounds
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "lift".
lift up
our mood,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
trigger the release of hormones in our brain, which can save us from depression, sadness and anxiety. Every region
is associated
to a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
genre, which evolved with their culture, history and religion. It absorbed the essence of time and grew along with it. Due to this regional tune
are considered
to have more depth and emotion as compared to the international ones
being listened
to these days by the youth. International
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
, in my opinion is
majorly
based on latest instruments and technology.

Music, be it in any form, songs, instrument
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sound
or a combination of multiple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sounds
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
crucial in any person’s life. It brings happiness and lighten the day for them, be it regional or international, one should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
sure they include one or both of them in their daily life.
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
Language is the road map of a culture. It tells you where its people come from and where they are going.
Rita Mae Brown

IELTS essay There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the International music that is heard everywhere nowadays? Use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. v. 11

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
273 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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