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The trend of drinking sugary drink in children is increasing but are reasons and what could be done?

The trend of drinking sugary drink in children is increasing but are reasons and what could be done? QV9eL
The trend of drinking carbonated drinks is increasing day by day. These sugary drinks pose serious threat to the human health. This treatise will scrutinize the potential precursors of this notion, along with the remedies to curb it. To embark with, first and foremost contributing factor is aggressive marketing of these products on television, radio, and internet. When youngsters and children see their favourite celebrities in these advertisements, they try to imitate them and tend to buy these unhealthy products. For instance, Indian cricket team is promoting soft drink Pepsi, eventually, lots of cricket fans used to drink soda to support their favourite cricketer. Secondly, the easy availability of soda. Anyone can find vending machines at schools, shopping malls, hospitals, railway stations, and airports therefore, chances of consuming soda increase gradually. There is myriad of ways to eliminate this menace. The sole prevention of any health crisis are regulations. Government should ban the soft drinks that contains high level of sugar. In allied to this, to reduce the consumption of soda heavy taxes should be imposed. Also, price should be increased to lower the consumption of soft drinks. Last but not least, public cognizance should be raised, government should join the hands with media to make public alert about the detrimental impact pf intaking sugar-based drinks on their health so that they can make healthy food choices. In nutshell, it can be inferred that to curb this predicament government should take concrete steps also individual awareness can also bring positive outcomes to combat this issue.
The trend of drinking carbonated
drinks
is increasing day by day. These sugary
drinks
pose serious threat to the human health. This treatise will scrutinize the potential precursors of this notion, along with the remedies to curb it.

To embark with,
first
and foremost contributing factor is aggressive marketing of these products on television, radio, and internet. When youngsters and children
see
their
favourite
celebrities in these advertisements, they try to imitate them and tend to
buy
these unhealthy products.
For instance
, Indian cricket team is promoting soft
drink
Pepsi,
eventually
, lots of cricket fans
used
to
drink
soda
to support their
favourite
cricketer.
Secondly
, the easy availability of
soda
. Anyone can find vending machines at schools, shopping malls, hospitals, railway stations, and airports
therefore
, chances of consuming
soda
increase
gradually
.

There is myriad of ways to eliminate this menace. The sole prevention of any health crisis are regulations.
Government
should ban the soft
drinks
that contains high level of sugar. In allied to this, to
reduce
the consumption of
soda
heavy taxes should
be imposed
.
Also
, price should
be increased
to lower the consumption of soft
drinks
. Last
but
not least, public cognizance should
be raised
,
government
should
join
the hands with media to
make
public alert about the detrimental impact pf
intaking
sugar-based
drinks
on their health
so
that they can
make
healthy food choices.

In nutshell, it can
be inferred
that to curb this predicament
government
should take concrete steps
also
individual awareness can
also
bring
positive
outcomes to combat this issue.
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IELTS essay The trend of drinking sugary drink in children is increasing but are reasons and what could be done?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
255 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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