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Some people think that life experience is more important than the formal education provided in schools and universities. How far do you agree with this statement, and provide examples?

Some people think that life experience is more important than the formal education provided in schools and universities. How far , and provide examples? KnRe6
Education is a tool for your success that no one can steal it from you. But some people believe that in reality the most important thing for the person to become successful and to survive is the best skills and the experience they have. As such, I totally agree with the statement that life experience is more important than formal education. In this essay, it will elaborate some examples and experiences that could support my opinion and thus lead to a logical conclusion. Firstly, having a diploma has a huge advantages for people when it comes to looking for a job. But, most of the people specially those who are fresh college graduates does not have any work experiences when applying jobs. In addition, some companies will look for employees who have work experiences rather than having a college degree status. For example, in real life when you are looking for a job some companies will hire people who have experiences because they know that certain person can do the job they offer. Secondly, also in our world today life experiences is important for the person to survive because if you do not have any skills or effort you will not become successful in life. Furthermore, having an formal education is just an additional tool for your success in life that give the person more knowledge in how to deal in real life. In conclusion, as to what being explained in the texts above, I conclude that life experiences is more important for the human to become successful in everything they do than having a formal education.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Education
is a tool for your success that no one can steal it from you.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that in reality the most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
thing for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
to become successful and to survive is the best
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
they have. As such, I
totally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the statement that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
is more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
than formal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
. In this essay, it will elaborate
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
examples and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
that could support my opinion and
thus
lead to a logical conclusion.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a diploma has a huge
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "advantage"?
advantages
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to looking for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
specially
those who are fresh college graduates does not have any work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
when applying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
.
In addition
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
will look for employees who have work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a college degree status.
For example
, in real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
when you are looking for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
will hire
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they know that certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
can do the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
they offer.
Secondly
,
also
in our world
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
to survive
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
if you do not have any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
or effort you will not become successful in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
an
formal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
an additional tool for your success in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
that give the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
more knowledge in how to deal in real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
In conclusion
, as to what being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explained
in the texts above, I conclude that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
is more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
for the human to become successful in everything they do than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a formal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
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IELTS essay Some people think that life experience is more important than the formal education provided in schools and universities. How far , and provide examples?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
267 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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