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The subjects that children are taught in schools are decided by central authorities. Some people say that teachers, not politicians, should be responsible for this task. To what extent you agree or disagree with this opinion? v.1

The subjects that children are taught in schools are decided by central authorities. Some people say that teachers, not politicians, should be responsible for this task. v. 1
In recent years, education system is becoming a concern in the society. Although some people argue that teacher should be responsible for designing the curriculum, others think that it is better for the central authorities to decide on this. There are several reasons why the decision of school subjects should be taken by central authorities. Firstly, the government has a better idea about the society and the economy needs of people. This means that their knowledge is built through research and experience by expects from distinct fields. Secondly, the government can make sure that the curriculum taught equip students with practical skills which will they have good career prospects after graduation. For example, in Vietnam the central authorities have decided to incorporate vocational subjects into the curriculum to improve employment for the employee. However, a teacher’s role is imparted knowledge and development methodology in the curriculum most effective way to help students can learn well. Their main mission assesses each student’s ability and learning ability and creating appropriate methods to help them understand and apply it to their career. Moreover, the job of the teacher is to deliver good teaching to the students, but not to make any decision about subjects. Since the teacher’s training program, educational expenditure and teacher’s salary all decided by the competent authority and only teachers obey the rules and regulations which given by the authority. In conclusion, governments and teachers have their distinctive role in education, but it would more beneficial if the government takes the role of setting the school’s curriculum.
In recent years, education system is becoming a concern in the society. Although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
argue that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
should be responsible for designing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
curriculum
, others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it is better for the central
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
authorities
to decide on this.

There are several reasons why the decision of school subjects should
be taken
by central
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
authorities
.
Firstly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
has a better
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
about the society and the economy needs of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. This means that their knowledge
is built
through research and experience by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expects
from distinct fields.
Secondly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
sure that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
curriculum
taught equip
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
with practical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
which will they have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
career prospects after graduation.
For example
, in Vietnam the central
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
authorities
have decided to incorporate vocational subjects into the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
curriculum
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
employment for the employee.

However
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher’s
role
is imparted
knowledge and development methodology in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
curriculum
most effective way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can learn well. Their main mission assesses each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student’s
ability and learning ability and creating appropriate methods to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them understand and apply it to their career.
Moreover
, the job of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
is to deliver
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
teaching to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
any decision about subjects. Since the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher’s
training program, educational expenditure and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher’s
salary all decided by the competent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
authority
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
obey the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulations which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
by the authority.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
have their distinctive role in education,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it would more beneficial if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
takes the role of setting the school’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
curriculum
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay The subjects that children are taught in schools are decided by central authorities. Some people say that teachers, not politicians, should be responsible for this task. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
257 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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