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The recent issue of the health

The recent issue of the health NyxLg
Having a good health is the thing that everyone needs. Long time ago, people invented and developed some medicines and special plants which can cure illnesses in order to protect the healthy and have a better life. However, up to now, people and doctors have still used them for the treatment. According to some famous doctors, there are some interesting and useful formulas invented by ancient people that we can use it. For example, plants that are grown on the top of the mountains are used to cure sore throat. Second, doctors advised us to try to go on a healthy diet on account of the advantages it can bring to us. Some doctors made an experiment on a great deal of volunteer who have to eat considerably in two months, as the result, not only can they improve their health, but they can also gain their living spirit, that’s why going on diet is really good and people tend to eat considerably. Despite all efforts of the doctors, people can’t fully change their life style so that they will be ill. Some people have to work hard every day and they are called to have lived in sedentary life and become more and more fat. Another reason that causes illnesses is the eating style, people who always eat fast food or drink soda can increase the amount of cholesterol. Overall, with the support of the doctor, we can be able to know how to eat in the right way and use medicines correctly. Nevertheless, we have to control our life styles by ourselves and we can contribute to make sure the next generation live in the better life
Having a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
health is the thing that everyone needs. Long time ago,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
invented and developed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
medicines and special plants which can cure illnesses in order to protect the healthy and have a better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
However
, up to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and
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doctors
have
still
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
them for the treatment. According to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doctors
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
interesting and useful formulas invented by ancient
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it.
For example
, plants that
are grown
on the top of the mountains are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to cure sore throat. Second,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doctors
advised us to try to go on a healthy diet on account of the advantages it can bring to us.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doctors
made an experiment on a great deal of volunteer who
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
considerably
in two months, as the result, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
can they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their health,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they can
also
gain their living spirit, that’s why going on diet is
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
tend to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
considerably
. Despite all efforts of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doctors
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can’t
fully
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their
Did you mean "lives"?
life
style
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they will be ill.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
every
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
day and
they
are called
to have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
in sedentary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and become more and more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
. Another reason that causes illnesses is the eating style,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who always
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
food or drink soda can increase the amount of cholesterol.
Overall
, with the support of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doctor
, we can be able to know how to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
in the right way and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
medicines
correctly
.
Nevertheless
, we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
control our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
styles by
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
ourselves and
we can contribute to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
sure the
next
generation
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in the better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
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IELTS essay The recent issue of the health

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
278 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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