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The Problems of my country Nigeria

The Problems of my country Nigeria XVMx8
Nigeria happens to be a country situated in the West African continent, it has the largest population in Africa, it is known for its raw materials of the earth and has acquired a large amount of funds and investment in exchange for the special raw materials. Sadly, Nigeria in all it’s endowment of wealth and special resources still happens to be the among the top most unsuccessful countries in the world. In terms of crime, Nigeria has the highest rate of criminal records by its citizens and the government as a whole.
Nigeria happens to be a country situated in the West African continent, it has the largest population in Africa, it
is known
for its raw materials of the earth and has acquired a large amount of funds and investment in exchange for the special raw materials.
Sadly
, Nigeria in all
Did you mean "its" (possessive pronoun)?
it’s
endowment of wealth and special resources
still
happens to be the among the top most unsuccessful countries in the world. In terms of crime, Nigeria has the highest rate of criminal records by its citizens and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
as a whole.
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IELTS essay The Problems of my country Nigeria

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
92 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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