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It is generally contended that school as well as university goers should engage themselves in part time jobs in order to reap benefits. Undoubtedly, I am extending my support towards given notion; however, a few demerits will be faced.

It is generally contended that school as well as university goers should engage themselves in part time jobs in order to reap benefits. Undoubtedly, I am extending my support towards given notion; however, a few demerits will be faced. 8QbOV
It is generally contended that school as well as university goers should engage themselves in part time jobs in order to reap benefits. Undoubtedly, I am extending my support towards given notion; however, a few demerits will be faced. On one hand, this concept invites plenty of upsides. Firstly, youngsters grab more opportunities in their life to attain successful career. To be more precise, by doing part-time jobs along with studies, they can think out a box that directly enhances their horizon. Moreover, this trend enables them to bear their own expenses owing to which they become self-reliant. Secondly, by working along with studies, they gain valuable experience due to the fact they become realistic as well as practical persons. For instance, every year, a number of Indian students march towards Canada, the UK and the USA where doing part-time jobs is mandatory to make their both ends meet. Furthermore, such students also take responsibilities of their parents and hence, they understand money’s value. On the other hand, this conception may also bring a set of downsides. In the beginning, doing job in parallel with studies may impose excessive burden on students due to the fact their study will lag behind. Additionally, this may also make them money-minded. To cite an example, in developed nations, magnitudes of youngsters have become money-mined and doing scores of jobs owing to which they are unable to perform better towards their academic aspects. To conclude, though doing part-time jobs during school and university education may have a seamy side but bright side outweighs dark one.
It is
generally
contended that school
as well
as university goers should engage themselves in
part time
jobs
in order to reap benefits.
Undoubtedly
, I am extending my support towards
given
notion;
however
, a few demerits will
be faced
.

On one hand, this concept invites
plenty
of upsides.
Firstly
, youngsters grab more opportunities in their life to attain successful career. To be more precise, by
doing
part-time
jobs
along with
studies
, they can
think
out a box that
directly
enhances their horizon.
Moreover
, this trend enables them to bear their
own
expenses owing to which they become self-reliant.

Secondly
, by working along with
studies
, they gain valuable experience due to the fact they become realistic
as well
as practical persons.
For instance
, every year, a number of Indian students march towards Canada, the UK and the USA where
doing
part-time
jobs
is mandatory to
make
their both ends
meet
.
Furthermore
, such students
also
take responsibilities of their parents and
hence
, they understand money’s value.

On the other hand
, this conception may
also
bring a set of downsides. In the beginning,
doing
job
in parallel with
studies
may impose excessive burden on students due to the fact their
study
will lag behind.
Additionally
, this may
also
make
them money-minded. To cite an example, in developed nations, magnitudes of youngsters have become money-mined and
doing
scores of
jobs
owing to which they are unable to perform better towards their academic aspects.

To conclude
, though
doing
part-time
jobs
during school and university education may have a seamy side
but
bright side outweighs dark one.
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IELTS essay It is generally contended that school as well as university goers should engage themselves in part time jobs in order to reap benefits. Undoubtedly, I am extending my support towards given notion; however, a few demerits will be faced.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
261 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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