Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The positive impact  in the future when at the moment old people will outnumber young people"

The positive impact in the future when at the moment old people will outnumber young people" NWQ8y
I think the impact will be positive. Many reasons support my argument Related to the topic like society, economy, and environment.   I hope that it will happen soon around the world. We need to think about the impact of twenty and more years on what will happen. In our society that people in twenty years, the young one will become older and the older will pass away. Decreasing the number of people will make our society stable. Too many people will turn out too many needs and too many problems. For example, when there are a lot of cars on the road make traffic jams thereafter stressful.   In addition, if we try to go to the amusement park therein a lot of people there will make our day ruins because of a long queue to try the games inside. In the economy, too many people will make us have a lot of needs (foods, amenities, houses, and etc). However, our space and production are limited to provide those things.   Moreover, a lot of proves and jump over to the conclusion that developed country has fewer people than developing country in terms of equivalent area and people. In our Environment, more people more space and food so, the result will cut down a lot of forests and the habitat of a lot of species. Furthermore,   someone from politics and scientist says that a quarter of the population now is the most reasonable number of humans to live. another reason support that our carrying capacity is limited to provide life for humans from the face of climate change. There is no reason for me to not support the formation of our next society. the distribution of population that old people will outnumber young people has a positive effect in the future.    another aspect like politics, culture and etc. is not included here and not taken into account for the arguments of this article because of the limited space.
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
the impact will be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
reasons support my argument Related to the topic like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
, economy, and environment.
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
I hope that it will happen
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
around the world. We need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about the impact of twenty and more years on what will happen.

In our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in twenty years, the young one will become older and the older will pass away. Decreasing the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
stable. Too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will turn out too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
needs and too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
problems.
For example
, when there are a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of cars on the road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
traffic jams thereafter stressful.
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
In addition
, if we try to go to the amusement park therein a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
there will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
our day ruins
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of a long queue to try the games inside.

In the economy, too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
us have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of needs (foods, amenities,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
,
Write the name of the item after 'and' or use only "etc".
and etc
).
However
, our space and production
are limited
to provide those things.
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
Moreover
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of proves and jump over to the conclusion that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed country
has fewer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing country
in terms of equivalent area and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

In our Environment, more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
more space and food
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, the result will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
down a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of forests and the habitat of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of species.
Furthermore
,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
someone from politics and scientist says that a quarter of the population
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
is the most reasonable number of humans to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
another
reason support that our carrying capacity
is limited
to provide life for humans from the face of climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
.

There is no reason for me to not support the formation of our
next
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
the
distribution of population that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will outnumber young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
has
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effect in the future.
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
  
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
another
aspect like politics, culture
Write the name of the item after 'and' or use only "etc".
and etc
. is not included here and not taken into account for the arguments of this article
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the limited space.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay The positive impact in the future when at the moment old people will outnumber young people"

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
331 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • The positive impact  in the future when at the moment old people will outnumber young people"