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The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today.

The given plan illustrates the changes made in a public park named Grange Park between 1920 and now. Overall, it can clearly be seen that the park has gone through a major transformation throughout the given period. This Park is accessible from Arnold Avenue and Eldon Street through the North and South main entrance, respectively. In terms of the Park prior to the development, a fountain was constructed in the center with a stage located in the center left of the Park available for musicians to perform. In addition, four seats were situated surrounding the stage, with rose gardens in between them. Thus audience could enjoy musical performances with the beautiful scenery of the roses. Furthermore, a glasshouse was available to the east of the Eldon Street entrance with a seat located near to it, whereas a rose garden and a pond can be found in the north east area. Regarding the changes in the Park, the fountain is demolished and replaced by a rose garden with four seats surrounding it, whereas the stage is upgraded to an amphitheater with a rose garden next to it that can be used for concerts. Furthermore, the seats in the east area has been cleared to make way of a new entrance to the underground carpark and the glasshouse is replaced with a water feature. Similarly, the place where rose garden and pond stood is replaced with a Cafe and children's play area to make the Park more convenient.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
plan illustrates the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
made in a public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
named Grange
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Park
between 1920 and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
.
Overall
, it can
clearly
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
has gone through a major transformation throughout the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Park
is accessible from Arnold Avenue and Eldon Street through the North and South main entrance,
respectively
. In terms of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Park
prior to the development, a fountain
was constructed
in the center with a stage located in the center
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Park
available for musicians to perform.
In addition
, four
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
seats
were situated
surrounding the stage, with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gardens
in between them.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Thus
audience could enjoy musical performances with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
scenery of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roses
.
Furthermore
, a glasshouse was available to the east of the Eldon Street entrance with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
seat
located near to it, whereas a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
garden
and a pond can
be found
in the
This expression is normally spelled as one or with hyphen.
north east
area. Regarding the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Park
, the fountain
is demolished
and replaced by a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
garden
with four
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
seats
surrounding it, whereas the stage
is upgraded
to an amphitheater with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
garden
next
to it that can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for concerts.
Furthermore
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
seats
in the east area has
been cleared
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
way of a new entrance to the underground
Possible spelling mistake found.
carpark
and the glasshouse
is replaced
with a water feature.
Similarly
, the place where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
garden
and pond stood
is replaced
with a
'Cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
Cafe
and children's play area to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Park
more convenient.
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IELTS essay The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
246 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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