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The pie charts below give information about world population in 1900 and 2000. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. v.1

The pie charts below give information about world population in 1900 and 2000.
There is an ever-increasing use of technology, such as tablets and laptops, in the classroom. It is often argued that this is a positive development, whilst others disagree and think it will lead to adverse ramifications. In this essay I agree that an increase in science is beneficial to students and teachers. This essay will discuss both points of view. It is clear that the internet has provided students with access to more information than ever before. Moreover, learners have the ability to research and learn about any subject at the touch of a button. It is therefore agreed that technology is a very worthwhile tool for education. Wikipedia is a prime example, where students can simply type in any keyword and gain access to in-depth knowledge quickly and easily. In conclusion, it’s obvious that using technology in the classroom is a great asset in literacy. However, many disagree and feel that technology deprives people of real human communication. Human communication teaches people valuable skills such as discourse, debate and empathy. Despite this, human interaction is still possible through the internet and this essay disagrees technology should be dismissed for this reason. For instance, Skype and Facebook make it possible for people to interact in ways that were never before possible. It is thus evident that technology is of a great benefit to standards in education. In conclusion, while the benefits of technology, particularly the internet, allow students to tap into limitless sources of information, some still feel that people should be wary of this new phenomenon and not allow it to curb face to face interaction. However, as long as we are careful to keep in mind the importance of human interaction in education, the educational benefits are clearly positive.
There is an ever-increasing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
, such as tablets and laptops, in the classroom. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
argued that this is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
development, whilst others disagree and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it will lead to adverse ramifications. In this essay I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that an increase in science is beneficial to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and teachers. This essay will discuss both points of view.

It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the internet has provided
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
with access to more information than ever
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
.
Moreover
, learners have the ability to research and learn about any subject at the touch of a button. It is
therefore
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agreed
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
worthwhile tool for education. Wikipedia is a prime example, where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can
simply
type in any keyword and gain access to in-depth knowledge
quickly
and
easily
.
In conclusion
, it’s obvious that using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
in the classroom is a great asset in literacy.

However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
disagree and feel that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
deprives
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
communication.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Human
communication teaches
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
valuable
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
such as discourse, debate and empathy. Despite this,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
interaction is
still
possible through the internet and this essay disagrees
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
should
be dismissed
for this reason
.
For instance
, Skype and Facebook
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it possible for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to interact in ways that were never
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
possible. It is
thus
evident that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
is of a great benefit to standards in education.

In conclusion
, while the benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
,
particularly
the internet,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to tap into limitless sources of information,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
still
feel that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should be wary of this new phenomenon and not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
it to curb face to face interaction.
However
, as long as we are careful to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
in mind the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
interaction in education, the educational benefits are
clearly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay The pie charts below give information about world population in 1900 and 2000.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
291 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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