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The only way to solve increasing crime rate of young offenders is to teach parents better parenting skills. To what extent do you agree?

The only way to solve increasing crime rate of young offenders is to teach parents better parenting skills. jjXy
It is argued that increasing unlawful rate of teenager is to teach their parents better parenting skills. I completely disagree with aforementioned statement because families are not only to care of children. First of all, in this modern generations, youngster are following aged people or actors and actress who do various illegal activities in movies or films. In addition, young people are likely to try unwanted things as shown in films. Moreover, in school, teachers are also sociable. If government imposes strict rules towards action and murder movies, adolscent will not tend to get experience of illegal sources. Recent survey by'The Times' found that 90% of human are act as a heros and heroine as films shows their lifestyle and habitat. As a result, people are engaged in several activities such as drugs seller, silent-killer and bullying. However, parents are also quite responsible for their behaviour due to fact that children are demanding for money and they provide it as much they want. Also, students are not aware unless family involved in their activities and what they are doing with their capital. Despite providing cash, parents should raise question to their child. For example, in 2001, One boy from Butwal, who was drug addicted, he sold 80% of furnitures of his houses to collect several medicine from drugs dealer. In conculsion, illegal activities which has learnt by teenager from movies, it should be banned. Also, parents should be provide awareness education.
It
is argued
that increasing unlawful rate of
teenager
is to teach their
parents
better parenting
skills
. I completely disagree with aforementioned statement
because
families are not
only
to care of children.

First of all
, in this modern generations, youngster are following aged
people
or actors and actress who do various illegal
activities
in movies or films.
In addition
, young
people
are likely to try unwanted things as shown in films.
Moreover
, in school, teachers are
also
sociable. If
government
imposes strict
rules
towards action and murder movies,
adolscent
will not tend to
get
experience of illegal sources. Recent survey by'The Times' found that 90% of human are act as a
heros
and heroine as films
shows
their lifestyle and habitat.
As a result
,
people
are engaged
in several
activities
such as drugs seller, silent-killer and bullying.

However
,
parents
are
also
quite responsible for their
behaviour
due to fact that children are demanding for
money and
they provide it as much they want.
Also
, students are not aware unless family involved in their
activities
and what they are doing with their capital. Despite providing cash,
parents
should raise question to their child.
For example
, in 2001, One boy from
Butwal
, who was drug addicted, he sold 80% of
furnitures
of his
houses
to collect
several medicine
from drugs dealer.

In
conculsion
, illegal
activities
which has
learnt
by
teenager
from movies, it should
be banned
.
Also
,
parents
should be
provide
awareness education.
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IELTS essay The only way to solve increasing crime rate of young offenders is to teach parents better parenting skills.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
241 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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