Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The only way to reduce the amount of traffic in cities today is by reducing the need for people to travel from home to work, shopping and education.

The only way to reduce the amount of traffic in cities today is by reducing the need for people to travel from home to work, shopping and education. yAdJ
It is considered that the right approach in order to fix the issue relating to the volume of traffic in cities is by decreasing the need of people to do travel from their homes to job sites, shopping or to the educational institutions. In my perception, I agree with this statement. The primary is that now days because of the influx of more people in to the cities the space got so much congested due to which it is very difficult to live there. In addition, to this the prices of rental rooms or properties are skyrocketed now and people spend their lot of money on paying rents and property taxes. While the other issue is rising pollution due to more vehicles on the road because of which the air quality got decreased. Moreover, to fix these issues the technology can help us out a lot as now days people can work or do shopping and studies right from their homes through internet which will help them to save their time and money for travel which they spend every day. Then there will less need to have personal vehicles which will reduce the pollution and congestion on the road. This will help our cities to stay clean and pollution free in order to make our healthy. In conclusion, in order to make cities congestion free people should take advantage of technology for instance internet to do shopping, studies and work which will make city’s more clean and better place to live for everyone.
It
is considered
that the right approach in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fix
the issue relating to the volume of traffic in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
is by decreasing the need of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to do travel from their homes to job sites, shopping or to the educational institutions. In my perception, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement.

The primary is that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
days
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the influx of more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
the space
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much congested due to which it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
difficult to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
there.
In addition
, to this the prices of rental rooms or properties
are skyrocketed
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
spend their lot of money on paying rents and property taxes.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
the other issue is rising pollution due to more vehicles on the road
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of which the air quality
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
decreased.

Moreover
, to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fix
these issues the technology can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us out a lot as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
days
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can work or
The usual collocation for an activity ending in "-ing" is "go" not "do" or "play." Revise: "go shopping".
do shopping
and studies right from their homes through internet which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to save their time and money for travel which they spend every day. Then there will less need to have personal vehicles which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the pollution and congestion on the road. This will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
to stay clean and pollution free in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
our healthy.

In conclusion
, in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
congestion free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should take advantage of technology
for instance
internet to
The usual collocation for an activity ending in "-ing" is "go" not "do" or "play." Revise: "go shopping".
do shopping
, studies and work which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
city’s more clean and better place to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
for everyone.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay The only way to reduce the amount of traffic in cities today is by reducing the need for people to travel from home to work, shopping and education.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
253 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts