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The only way to reduce the amount of traffic in cities is by reducing the need for people to travel from home for work, education or shopping. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.4

The only way to reduce the amount of traffic in cities is by reducing the need for people to travel from home for work, education or shopping. v. 4
Population is increasing day by day, due to which traffic on roads is also increasing. Some people believe that if we can reduce the need for people to travel from home to work, shopping, it will help in reducing the traffic. I disagree with the statement as we cannot have all the people in their houses all the time. The traffic is increased due to the excessive use of private vehicles. Nowadays, there are more number of cars on the roads as compared to the people it can carry. People want to travel in their private vehicle as it is easy to reach to their destination. People travelling to same office building prefer to come in separate cars. A bus has the capacity of carrying 80 passengers approximately which means a single bus can replace 80 cars on the road. People should use public transport for travelling to offices. We cannot restrict a child in his home and expect that he will get proper education. A student needs to go to school, college in order to get higher studies. We cannot shop for all the resources online like groceries so we need to go to shopping malls in order to buy them. Also, people travel to have a peace of mind after working for more than 8 hours, 5 days a week. To sum up, we cannot control the traffic on roads by limiting the need for travel. Instead of that government should encourage people to use public transport whenever possible. It will not only reduce traffic, but will also help in reducing pollution as less number of vehicles on road lesser will be the air pollution.
Population is increasing day by day, due to which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
is
also
increasing.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that if we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
from home to work, shopping, it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in reducing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
. I disagree with the statement as we cannot have all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
all the time. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
is increased
due to the excessive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of private vehicles.

Nowadays, there are more number of cars on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
as compared to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
it can carry.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
want to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
in their private vehicle as it is easy to reach to their destination.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
travelling to same office building prefer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
in separate cars. A bus has the capacity of carrying 80 passengers approximately which means a single bus can replace 80 cars on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
public transport for travelling to offices.

We cannot restrict a child in his home and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
that he will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
proper education. A student
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
to go to school, college in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
higher studies. We cannot shop for all the resources online like groceries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to go to shopping malls in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
them.
Also
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
to have a peace of mind after working for more than 8 hours, 5 days a week.

To sum up, we cannot control the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
by limiting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
.
Instead
of that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
public transport whenever possible. It will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
will
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in reducing pollution as less number of vehicles on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
lesser will be the air pollution.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
27Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
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Kató Lomb

IELTS essay The only way to reduce the amount of traffic in cities is by reducing the need for people to travel from home for work, education or shopping. v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
277 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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