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The news is a source of knowledge about the world. How much can we trust the journalists? What are the qualities a good journalist should have? v.1

The news is a source of knowledge about the world. How much can we trust the journalists? What are the qualities a good journalist should have? v. 1
It is undeniable that news media has been an indispensable part of our life, displaying a much colourful world in front of us than ever before. Thanks to the development of the news media technology and the profession of journalists, we no longer feel unfamiliar about the other side of the planet. While enjoying the wide knowledge brought by the reporters, we should also take this news with a pinch of salt as some information seems to be enticing but may not be based on the truth of the fact. As we all know, most news companies run to make profits, which is likely to make some journalists distort their reports to earn ratings. Meanwhile, many news media are controlled by some powerful institutes including the government, which would cause the journalists reporting tendentious news for they want to be in favour of the government rather than the public. Spreading knowledge of the world for the public but not propagandising for a certain powerful organisation is the main quality a journalist should have. He should at least possess the following qualities: First of all, he should be unbiased and not easily swayed by any party or group, reporting the news as factual as it is. Second, journalists need to report news of such various fields of society, science, geology, medicine, entertainment etc. ; it would be tough for him to handle this job well if he is not versatile. Also, the most important personality of a journalist is that he must be brave and bold enough because there must be tough barriers waiting for him to break down. In conclusion, we should keep a clear head for the news reported by the journalists and a good journalist should possess a multifaceted personality.
It is undeniable that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
media has been an indispensable part of our life, displaying a much
Possible spelling mistake. 'colourful' is British English.
colourful
world in front of us than ever
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
. Thanks to the development of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
media technology and the profession of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
journalists
, we no longer feel unfamiliar about the other side of the planet.

While enjoying the wide knowledge brought by the reporters, we should
also
take this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
with a pinch of salt as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
information seems to be enticing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
may not
be based
on the truth of the fact. As we all know, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
run to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
profits, which is likely to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
journalists
distort their reports to earn ratings. Meanwhile,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
media
are controlled
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
powerful institutes including the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
, which would cause the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
journalists
reporting tendentious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
for they want to be in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
rather
than the public.

Spreading knowledge of the world for the public
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not
Possible spelling mistake. 'propagandising' is British English.
propagandising
for a certain powerful
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisation' is British English.
organisation
is the main quality a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
journalist
should have. He should at least possess the following qualities:
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, he should
be unbiased
and not
easily
swayed by any party or group, reporting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
as factual as it is. Second,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
journalists
need to report
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
of such various fields of society, science, geology, medicine, entertainment etc. ; it would be tough for him to handle this job well if he is not versatile.
Also
, the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
personality of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
journalist
is that he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be brave and bold
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be tough barriers waiting for him to break down.

In conclusion
, we should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
head for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
reported by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
journalists
and a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
journalist
should possess a multifaceted personality.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
17Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes
Language is the blood of the soul into which thoughts run and out of which they grow.
Oliver Wendell Holmes

IELTS essay The news is a source of knowledge about the world. How much can we trust the journalists? What are the qualities a good journalist should have? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
292 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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