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The news is an important source of knowledge for all of us about the world, especially in this era of technology. Journalists are mainly responsible to bring this news to us but not all of them are true to their responsibilities and ethics. How much can we trust the journalists? v.2

The news is an important source of knowledge for all of us about the world, especially in this era of technology. Journalists are mainly responsible to bring this news to us but not all of them are true to their responsibilities and ethics. How much can we trust the journalists? v. 2
In this day and age, thanks to the technological advancements, people can instantly access to global information through many news and reports. This condition also raises a question of integrity and ethics of journalists. From my perspective, we cannot completely trust the journalists for the following reason. It is inevitable that the competition of journalism industry can negatively affect the reliability of news and reports in some ways. In order to gain the achievement over their counterparts, some publishing agencies can include an enormous number of click bait news on their web pages. What is more, it is the speed requirement for writing articles that make the writers cannot criticize their report before submitting to their managers. To exemplify, in the COVID-19 Pandemic, there comes a large amount of superficial news on the social media, which derives from from lack of journalists’ authenticity. It is undeniable that there are still many couragous and professional pressman who are taking their profession as a responsibility to bring the readers more profound news. Nevertheless, due to the competition in this industry, the journalists seem to take the risk of their own career to show the truth to the audience. Such journalists are showing us the true value of information; furthermore, it is also a way to make the life better. Taking all things into consideration, we can obtain more benefits from the help of innovative techniques. However, we also cannot prevent its drawbacks, namely fabricated news is ubiquitous. For this reason, as the informed audiences, we should be wary of unreliable journalists and aware of doing crosscheck for the facts and truths when reading a piece of information.
In this day and age, thanks to the technological advancements,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can
instantly
access to global information through
Use "much" or "little" with uncountable nouns.
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
and reports. This condition
also
raises a question of integrity and ethics of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
journalists
. From my perspective, we cannot completely trust the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
journalists
for the following reason.

It is inevitable that the competition of journalism industry can
negatively
affect the reliability of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
and reports in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
ways. In order to gain the achievement over their counterparts,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
publishing agencies can include an enormous number of
This word is normally spelled as one.
click bait
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
on their web pages.
What is more
, it is the speed requirement for writing articles that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the writers cannot criticize their report
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
submitting to their managers. To exemplify, in the COVID-19 Pandemic, there
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
a large amount of superficial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
on the social media, which derives
Possible typo: you repeated a word
from from
lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
journalists’
authenticity.

It is undeniable that there are
still
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Possible spelling mistake found.
couragous
and professional
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "pressmen"?
pressman
who are taking their profession as a responsibility to bring the readers more profound
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
.
Nevertheless
, due to the competition in this industry, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
journalists
seem to take the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
career to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
the truth to the audience. Such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
journalists
are showing us the true value of information;
furthermore
, it is
also
a way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the life better.

Taking all things into consideration, we can obtain more benefits from the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of innovative techniques.
However
, we
also
cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
its drawbacks,
namely
fabricated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
is ubiquitous.
For this reason
, as the informed audiences, we should be wary of unreliable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
journalists
and aware of doing crosscheck for the facts and truths when reading a piece of information.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
12Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes
A foreign language is like a frail, delicate muscle. If you do not use it, it weakens.
Jhumpa Lahiri

IELTS essay The news is an important source of knowledge for all of us about the world, especially in this era of technology. Journalists are mainly responsible to bring this news to us but not all of them are true to their responsibilities and ethics. How much can we trust the journalists? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
275 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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