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The most Embarrassing moment in my life

The most Embarrassing moment in my life m922L
I do prefer traveling to staying at home on vacation. Although staying at home offers extra time for my favorite activities, traveling can boost happiness, peace of mind and make me feel relaxed. If somebody ask me about the place I always wanted to go and I have never been to, I will simply answer "South Korea". I have heard many foreigners want to visit Korea. Some of them want to stay there permanently and including myself too. I have a great deal of reasons why I am willing to visit there. I want to visit many beautiful and stunning places, meet my favorite singers, wear "Hanbok" which is the traditional costume of South Korea and enjoy the colorful life and the foods of it. To be perfectly honest, I am eager to go Korea by watching K-Drama and by listening to K-pop songs which are sung my idols. From my point of view, spring season is the good time to visit there because I would like to see the vibrant pink of the Cherry Blossoms. I can definitely say that I will be excited if I visit Jeju island, the most pleasurable place, I’ve seen in most of the Korean drama. I also wish to visit Seoul, the drizzling capital city where the beautiful Namsan Tower and Han river exists. Namsan Tower is also a place where love Cupid’s make their wish and lock their love in the pad lock, to symbolize eternity of true love. If I reach there one day, I guess I will surely take a lot of photographs and post them on my Instagram and Facebook. In my opinion, at night it will be totally enjoyable walking around the streets of Korea and eating their street foods like Tteokbokki and Hotdogs. Besides, there is no way to meet my favorite singers except going to South Korea. I do want to attend their fan meetings and their concerts at least once in my lifetime. Finally, I’m willing to wear the pretty and attractive Korean traditional dress. Since I was young, I was crazy about the princess with the beautiful dresses and I thought I also may look like a princess when I’ll wear beautiful Korean costume dress. There are also massive amazing things about South Korea that I can only feel and explore when I visit there, and I hope I can do someday before I die. If my dream becomes reality, I will have to buy a best quality camera to record those beautiful things.
I do prefer traveling to staying at home on vacation. Although staying at home offers extra time for my favorite activities, traveling can boost happiness, peace of mind and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
me feel relaxed. If somebody
The pronoun 'somebody' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "asks", "asked".
ask
me about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
I always wanted to go and I have never been to, I will
simply
answer
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
South Korea
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
. I have heard
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
foreigners
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
Korea.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
of them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to stay there
permanently
and including myself too. I have a great deal of reasons why I am willing to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
there. I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beautiful
and stunning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
my favorite singers, wear
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
Possible spelling mistake found.
Hanbok
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
which is the traditional costume of South Korea and enjoy the colorful life and the foods of it.

To be
perfectly
honest, I am eager to go Korea by watching K-Drama and by listening to K-pop songs which
are sung
my idols. From my point of view, spring season is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
time to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
there
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I would like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the vibrant pink of the Cherry Blossoms. I can definitely say that I will
be excited
if I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
Possible spelling mistake found.
Jeju
island, the most pleasurable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
, I’ve
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in most of the Korean drama. I
also
wish to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
Seoul, the drizzling capital city where the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beautiful
Possible spelling mistake found.
Namsan
Tower and Han river exists.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Namsan
Tower is
also
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
where
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
Cupid’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their wish and lock their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
in the pad lock, to symbolize eternity of true
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
. If I reach there one day, I guess I will
surely
take
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
photographs and post them on my Instagram and Facebook. In my opinion, at night it will be
totally
enjoyable walking around the streets of Korea and eating their street foods like
Possible spelling mistake found.
Tteokbokki
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
Hotdogs
.
Besides
, there is no way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
my favorite singers except going to South Korea. I do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to attend their fan meetings and their concerts at least once in my lifetime.
Finally
, I’m willing to wear the pretty and attractive Korean traditional dress. Since I was young, I was crazy about the princess with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beautiful
dresses and I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
I
also
may look like a princess when I’ll wear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beautiful
Korean costume dress.

There are
also
massive amazing things about South Korea that I can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
feel and explore when I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
there, and I hope I can do someday
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
. If my dream becomes reality, I will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
Use "the" with the superlative.
a
best quality camera to record those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beautiful
things.
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IELTS essay The most Embarrassing moment in my life

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
420 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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