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The man expresses his opinion about the new attendance scheme. State his opinion and explain the reasons he gives for holding his opinion. v.1

The man expresses his opinion about the new attendance scheme. State his opinion and explain the reasons he gives for holding his opinion. v. 1
NO ONE IS RESSITE THEMSELVE FROM EXPERIENCIES A DETRIMENTAL TIME. SO, CERTAIN FOLKS ARGUE NOT TO THINK MUCH AND COMPROMIZE WITH WHATEVER THE SITUATION IS. WHILE, REST OF THE FOLKS SAYS THAT RATHER THAN BEING UNDERCPONTROL OF FAITE, TRY TO CHANGE THE SITUATION BY FINDING PLETHORA OF ALTERNATIVES OF THE AWFULL PERIOD. FIRSTLY, THIS ESSAY WILL DISCUSS WHY PEOPLE ACCEPT THE SITUATION THAN TRYING OTHER WAYS AND SECODNDLY, THE REASON BEHIND ENHANCING THE CONDITION. LASTLY, STATE THE OPINION IN THE FAVOR OF PEOPLE WHO THINKS THAT WE SHOULD TRY TO MODIFIY THE SITUATION OTHER THAN JSUT ACCEPTING IT. ON THE ONE HAND, THE PRIME REASON IS ACCEPTING THE BAD SITUATION IS THE LACK OF SELF CONFIDENCE AND DOUBT ON OWN ABILITIES. SOMETIMES WHEN AWFUL THINGS HAPPENS FREQUENTLY WITH THE PERSON, AUTOMATICALLY PERSON WOULD LOOSE HIS CONFIDENCE AS HE THINKS, AFTER ALL HARD WORK NOTHING IS WORINGOUT PERFECTLY. THIS WOULD PUT HIM IN THE SITUATION WHERE HE DOES NOT HAVE TOHER WAY TO IGNORE THE SIOTUATION. BUT ACCEPTING IT THE WAY IT IS. FOR EXAMPLE, HUMAN RESEAERCH DEPARTMENT OD THE UK REVEALED THAT 70 % OF THE PEOPLE AROUD THE WORLD ACCEPT THE BAD SITUATION DUE TO LACK OF FAITH IN THEMSELVE. ON THE OTHER HAND, THE PRIME REASON IS TO KEEP TRYING IS IT WOULD INCREASE THE PATIENCE AND HELP IN FINDING THE BETTER WAY TO DEAL WITH LIFE. THIS WOULD MAKE PERSON HAPPY AND LIVE THEIR LONGER AS THIS WOULD ESULT IN THE MINIMAL FITNESS ISSUES SUCH AS DEPRESSION, NEUROLOGICAL PROBLEMS AND SO ON. FOR INSTANCE, INDIAN REHABILITATION CENTER DID A SURVEY AND FOUND THAT 60% OF THE INDIAN CILIAN ARE JOLLY PEOPLE AND LIVING THEIR LIFE WITH LESS HEALTH PROBLEMS. FROM MY POINT OF VIEW, I BELIEVE, IF WE CHANGE THE WAY WE LOOK AT THE BAD SITUTION AND FIND HAPPINESS WITH WHATEVER WE HAVE, THEMN SURELY, WE WOU; LD TACKLE THE MENACE WHO ARE LOOSING THEIR HOPE AND LIVING LIFE IN THE BAD SITUATION. THIS WOULD BE SUCCESSFUL IF THE REGIME AND INDIVIDUAL WORK TOGATHER AS A TEAM. IN CONCLUSION, ANY CONDITION OR TIME TEACH US SOMETHING ABOUT THE LIFE. PERHAPS, RATHER THAN ACCEPTING IF PERSON SHOWS THE COURAGE AND FIGHT WITH HARD TIME WITH ALL STRENGTH AND SUPPORT. ON ONE WOULD LOIVE THIER LIFE WITH IMPOVERISHED PERIOD IN THE WORLD.
NO ONE IS
Possible spelling mistake found.
RESSITE
Possible spelling mistake found.
THEMSELVE
FROM
Possible spelling mistake found.
EXPERIENCIES
A DETRIMENTAL TIME.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
SO
, CERTAIN FOLKS ARGUE NOT TO
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
THINK
MUCH AND
Possible spelling mistake found.
COMPROMIZE
WITH WHATEVER THE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
SITUATION
IS. WHILE, REST OF THE FOLKS SAYS THAT
RATHER
THAN BEING
Possible spelling mistake found.
UNDERCPONTROL
OF
Possible spelling mistake found.
FAITE
, TRY TO
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
CHANGE
THE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
SITUATION
BY FINDING PLETHORA OF ALTERNATIVES OF THE
Possible spelling mistake found.
AWFULL
PERIOD.
FIRSTLY
, THIS ESSAY WILL DISCUSS WHY
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
PEOPLE
ACCEPT THE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
SITUATION
THAN TRYING OTHER WAYS AND
Possible spelling mistake found.
SECODNDLY
, THE REASON BEHIND ENHANCING THE CONDITION.
LASTLY
, STATE THE OPINION IN THE FAVOR OF
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
PEOPLE
WHO
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
THINKS
THAT WE SHOULD TRY TO
Possible spelling mistake found.
MODIFIY
THE
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SITUATION
OTHER THAN
Possible spelling mistake found.
JSUT
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ACCEPTING
IT.

ON THE ONE HAND, THE PRIME REASON IS
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ACCEPTING
THE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
BAD
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
SITUATION
IS THE LACK OF SELF CONFIDENCE AND DOUBT ON
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
OWN
ABILITIES.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
SOMETIMES
WHEN AWFUL THINGS HAPPENS
FREQUENTLY
WITH THE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
PERSON
,
AUTOMATICALLY
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
PERSON
WOULD
Did you mean "lose" (= miss, waste, suffer the loss etc.)?
LOOSE
HIS CONFIDENCE AS HE
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
THINKS
,
AFTER ALL
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
HARD
WORK NOTHING IS
Possible spelling mistake found.
WORINGOUT
PERFECTLY
. THIS WOULD PUT HIM IN THE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
SITUATION
WHERE HE DOES NOT HAVE
Possible spelling mistake found.
TOHER
WAY TO
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
IGNORE
THE
Possible spelling mistake found.
SIOTUATION
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
BUT
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ACCEPTING
IT THE WAY IT IS.
FOR EXAMPLE
, HUMAN
Possible spelling mistake found.
RESEAERCH
DEPARTMENT OD THE UK REVEALED THAT 70 % OF THE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
PEOPLE
Possible spelling mistake found.
AROUD
THE WORLD ACCEPT THE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
BAD
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
SITUATION
DUE TO LACK OF FAITH IN
Possible spelling mistake found.
THEMSELVE
.

ON THE OTHER HAND
, THE PRIME REASON IS TO
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
KEEP
TRYING IS IT WOULD INCREASE THE PATIENCE AND
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
HELP
IN FINDING THE BETTER WAY TO DEAL WITH
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
LIFE
. THIS WOULD
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
MAKE
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PERSON
HAPPY AND
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
LIVE
THEIR LONGER AS THIS WOULD
Possible spelling mistake found.
ESULT
IN THE MINIMAL FITNESS ISSUES SUCH AS DEPRESSION, NEUROLOGICAL PROBLEMS AND
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
SO
ON.
FOR INSTANCE
, INDIAN REHABILITATION CENTER DID A SURVEY AND FOUND THAT 60% OF THE INDIAN
Possible spelling mistake found.
CILIAN
ARE JOLLY
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
PEOPLE
AND LIVING THEIR
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
LIFE
WITH LESS HEALTH PROBLEMS.

FROM MY POINT OF VIEW, I BELIEVE, IF WE
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
CHANGE
THE WAY WE LOOK AT THE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
BAD
Possible spelling mistake found.
SITUTION
AND FIND HAPPINESS WITH WHATEVER WE HAVE,
Possible spelling mistake found.
THEMN
SURELY
, WE
Possible spelling mistake found.
WOU
; LD TACKLE THE MENACE WHO ARE LOOSING THEIR HOPE AND LIVING
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
LIFE
IN THE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
BAD
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
SITUATION
. THIS WOULD BE SUCCESSFUL IF THE REGIME AND INDIVIDUAL WORK
Possible spelling mistake found.
TOGATHER
AS A TEAM.

IN CONCLUSION
, ANY CONDITION OR TIME TEACH US SOMETHING ABOUT THE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
LIFE
. PERHAPS,
RATHER
THAN
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ACCEPTING
IF
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
PERSON
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
SHOWS
THE COURAGE AND FIGHT WITH
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
HARD
TIME WITH ALL STRENGTH AND SUPPORT. ON ONE WOULD
Possible spelling mistake found.
LOIVE
Possible spelling mistake found.
THIER
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
LIFE
WITH IMPOVERISHED PERIOD IN THE WORLD.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
I love commuting between languages just like I love commuting between cultures and cities.
Elif Safak

IELTS essay The man expresses his opinion about the new attendance scheme. State his opinion and explain the reasons he gives for holding his opinion. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
384 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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