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The line graph illustrates changes in the amount and type of fast food consumption among adolescents in Australia during 25-year-period between 1975 and 2000.

The line graph illustrates changes in the amount and type of fast food consumption among adolescents in Australia during 25-year-period between 1975 and 2000. Nlelq
The line graph illustrates changes in the amount and type of fast food consumption among adolescents in Australia during 25-year-period between 1975 and 2000. Overall, what stands out from the graph is that whereas pizza and hamburgers experienced a rapid climb, fish and chips decreased over the given period. Focusing on pizza and hamburgers, at the beginning of the period in 1975 number of consuming rate was below 20 times per year. Next, pizza witnessed a significant growth approximately 75 times more than at the start in 10-year period from 1975 to 1985. Despite hamburger's steady climbing, this figure was followed by considerable rise reaching it's peak of 85 times per year in a following decade. In the end of the period both of them remained unchanged at their peaks. With regards to the fish and chips, starting from a high of annual 100 times eaten fast food in 1975, line continued falling with a few fluctuations until 1985. This figure, whish had the most of the consumption with about 90 times per year, fell strikingly in the final years to approximately 40 times in 2000.
The line graph illustrates
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in the amount and type of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
food consumption among adolescents in Australia during 25-year-period between 1975 and 2000.

Overall
, what stands out from the graph is that whereas pizza and hamburgers experienced a rapid climb, fish and chips decreased over the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period.

Focusing on pizza and hamburgers, at the beginning of the period in 1975 number of consuming rate was below 20
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
.
Next
, pizza witnessed a significant growth approximately 75
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times
more than at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
10-year
period from 1975 to 1985. Despite hamburger's steady climbing, this figure
was followed
by considerable rise reaching
Did you mean "its" (possessive pronoun) instead of 'it's' (short form of 'it is')?
it's
peak of 85
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
in a following decade. In the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the period both of them remained unchanged at their peaks.

Use "in regard to", "with regard to", or more simply "regarding".
With regards to
the fish and chips, starting from a high of annual 100
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
eaten
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
food in 1975, line continued falling with a few fluctuations until 1985. This figure,
Possible spelling mistake found.
whish
had the most of the consumption with about 90
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
, fell
strikingly
in the final years to approximately 40
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
in 2000.
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IELTS essay The line graph illustrates changes in the amount and type of fast food consumption among adolescents in Australia during 25-year-period between 1975 and 2000.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
186 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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