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The high sales of popular consumer goods

The high sales of popular consumer goods Aw2We
Advertising is well – known as a method of promotion. It is a method used by corporations to introduce their products and services to the market, attract the eye of consumers and increase sales. Critics of advertising argue that this is the only way of increasing sales of some products, inducing consumers to purchase what they do not need in their daily lives. From my personal perspective, this contention is self – evident. In the next few paragraphs, I will discuss this statement in detail. Advertisement conquers the audience mainly by sending them the message they are unaware of specific brands or products. And this can lead to a situation where the customers make wrong decisions to purchase the things they do not need. The advertisements related to medicine, dietary supplement and other life-enhancing products provide a typical example. Targeting the buyers who are worried about health, advertisers have sought to encourage them to think that they are threatened by such problems like malnutrition or dysfunctioning of any of their body parts. Due to lack of knowledge in this field, the audience will rush to purchase the advertised products. Such cases are ever-present. Advertising also works to create a best – seller image for a newly – marketed product. The audiences are tempted to buy it in the hope that they can become participants of a fad. It is not uncommon that cell phone users replace their phones every year, although the phone they have abandoned is still in usable conditions. They might not need to make purchases frequently, but advertising spurs them to do so. Advertisers too, often misuse the power of advertising. Although the presence of advertisements spread knowledge about the latest tecnological inventions, more often than not, they only create a hole in the pocket. In conclusion, people should stay alert to the influence, advertisements have on their decision-making process. As indicated above, advertising usually has twisted information about what products contain, or how a product is flavoured, thereby driving people to make insensible decisions.
Advertising is well
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
known as a method of promotion. It is a method
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by corporations to introduce their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
and services to the market, attract the eye of consumers and increase sales. Critics of advertising argue that this is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
way of increasing sales of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
, inducing consumers to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
purchase
what they do not need in their daily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. From my personal perspective, this contention is
A dash was used instead of a hyphen. Did you mean: "self-evident".
self – evident
. In the
next
few paragraphs, I will discuss this statement in detail.

Advertisement conquers the audience
mainly
by sending them the message they are unaware of specific brands or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
. And this can lead to a situation where the customers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
decisions to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
purchase
the things they do not need. The advertisements related to medicine, dietary supplement and other life-enhancing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
provide a typical example. Targeting the buyers who
are worried
about health, advertisers have sought to encourage them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that they
are threatened
by such problems like malnutrition or
Possible spelling mistake found.
dysfunctioning
Consider simply using "of" instead.
of any of
their body parts. Due to lack of knowledge in this field, the audience will rush to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
purchase
the advertised
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
. Such cases are ever-present.

Advertising
also
works to create
Use "the" with the superlative.
a
best
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
seller image for a
newly
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
marketed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
. The audiences
are tempted
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
it in the hope that they can become participants of a fad. It is not uncommon that cell phone users replace their phones every year, although the phone they have abandoned is
still
in usable conditions. They might not need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
purchases
frequently
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
advertising spurs them to do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
. Advertisers too,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
misuse the power of advertising.

Although the presence of advertisements spread knowledge about the latest
Possible spelling mistake found.
tecnological
inventions, more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
than not, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
create a hole in the pocket.

In conclusion
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
should stay alert to the influence, advertisements have on their decision-making process. As indicated above, advertising
usually
has twisted information about what
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
contain, or how a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
is
Possible spelling mistake. 'flavoured' is British English.
flavoured
, thereby driving
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
insensible decisions.
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IELTS essay The high sales of popular consumer goods

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
338 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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