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The growth of online shopping will one day lead to the closure of shops in cities and towns Do you agree or disagree v.1

The growth of online shopping will one day lead to the closure of shops in cities and towns v. 1
The past years have seen a dramatic increase in online purchase. While some people believe it may lead to the closure of shops in cities and towns. I wholeheartedly think that in_store shopping would definitely remain the most desirable way of shopping owing to many reasons. Admittedly, shopping from in_store is tremendously beneficial than e_store for many reasons. First and foremost is shipping fees. If you chose to purchase from a store or a mall, you would not have to pay shipping fees. Whereas, in online shopping you will need shipping fees. For instance, Amazon is putting shipping fees regardless your purchase amount. Hence, in_store purchase will not squander your money on unnecessary fees. Secondly and even more importantly is experience a product which means you can see the material and content of your product. I believe it is extremely helpful in purchasing personal things such as clothing and check whether it fits your or not. As a result, you would be totally satisfied with your product. In addition, Shopping from in_store has a plethora of benefits over online shopping. Advice from the staff is one of them. They can help you not only in choosing the appropriate products for your, but also in comparing with other brands. Furthermore, urgency benefit. Which saves you time. For example, if you have a meeting tomorrow and you need a new suit, you would not have to wait delays with online shopping. Take souq. com in Egypt as an example in which you will need at least three days to receive your product, Nevertheless, with in_store shopping you can get it in the same day Hence, instant gratification is one of the main reasons behind the huge popularity of in_store shopping as you can walk out of the door with your purchase. In conclusion, although many benefits of online shopping, in_store purchase will definitely remain the most predominant way of shopping owing to no shipping fees are required, valuable advices from the staff, urgency and instant gratification.
The past years have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
a dramatic increase in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
purchase
. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe it may lead to the closure of shops in cities and towns. I
wholeheartedly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
In standard English, a word does not contain an underscore character (_). Make sure that the word 'in _ store' is correct.
in_store
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
would definitely remain the most desirable way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
owing to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons.

Admittedly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
from
In standard English, a word does not contain an underscore character (_). Make sure that the word 'in _ store' is correct.
in_store
is
tremendously
Use "(beneficial)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
beneficial
than
In standard English, a word does not contain an underscore character (_). Make sure that the word 'e _ store' is correct.
e_store
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons.
First
and foremost is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shipping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fees
. If you chose to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
purchase
from a store or a mall, you would not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
pay
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shipping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fees
.
“Whereas” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Whereas
, in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
you will need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shipping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fees
.
For instance
, Amazon is putting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shipping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fees
regardless your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
purchase
amount.
Hence
,
In standard English, a word does not contain an underscore character (_). Make sure that the word 'in _ store' is correct.
in_store
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
purchase
will not squander your money on unnecessary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fees
.
Secondly
and even more
importantly
is experience a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
which means you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the material and content of your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
. I believe it is
extremely
helpful in purchasing personal things such as clothing and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
whether it fits your or not.
As a result
, you would be
totally
satisfied with your product.

In addition
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Shopping
from
In standard English, a word does not contain an underscore character (_). Make sure that the word 'in _ store' is correct.
in_store
has a plethora of benefits over
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
. Advice from the staff is one of them. They can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
you not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
in choosing the appropriate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
for your,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
in comparing with other brands.
Furthermore
, urgency benefit. Which saves you time.
For example
, if you have a meeting tomorrow and you need a new suit, you would not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
wait delays with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
. Take
Possible spelling mistake found.
souq
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
com
in Egypt as an example in which you will need at least three days to receive your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
,
Nevertheless
, with
In standard English, a word does not contain an underscore character (_). Make sure that the word 'in _ store' is correct.
in_store
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
it in the same day
Hence
, instant gratification is one of the main reasons behind the huge popularity of
In standard English, a word does not contain an underscore character (_). Make sure that the word 'in _ store' is correct.
in_store
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
as you can walk out of the door with your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
.

In conclusion
, although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
,
In standard English, a word does not contain an underscore character (_). Make sure that the word 'in _ store' is correct.
in_store
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
purchase
will definitely remain the most predominant way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
owing to no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shipping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fees
are required
, valuable advices from the staff, urgency and instant gratification.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
36Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Mistakes
A special kind of beauty exists which is born in language, of language, and for language.
Gaston Bachelard

IELTS essay The growth of online shopping will one day lead to the closure of shops in cities and towns v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
334 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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