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The growing number of overweight people s putting a strain on the health care system in an effort to deal with the health issues involve. Some people that the best way to deal with this problem is to introduce more physical education lessons in school cur v.1

The growing number of overweight people s putting a strain on the health care system in an effort to deal with the health issues involve. Some people that the best way to deal with this problem is to introduce more physical education lessons in school cur v. 1
Athletes represent a popular public figure and are considered role models for many youths today. Many individuals believe that; it is acceptable for the sports-person to behave badly at their will provided that they have a successful sports career. This essay will further discuss the disagreement with the aforementioned statement. It is crucial for any individual working in the field of entertainment to maintain its reputation. This is important, because they set an example for younger minds. When a sportsman or a sportswoman is caught using abusive words in public, it implies that adopting such tactics are perks of success by the young generation. For instance, recently a renowned Indian cricket team captain Virakt Kohli was captured using an abusive word on-field. Such behaviour should be discouraged and must be considered as a punishable offence by the cricket authorities. Moreover, it is also important for the sports professional to establish a reputation off-field. Many sportsmen today are labelled with the tag of drug abusers. There are examples of the Olympic players using steroids to increase their efficiency on the day of their sport. Encouraging such shortcuts would leave a detrimental impact on the youths. When a sports individual associated with such drug abusive activities, it affects the brands they endorse. The reputation of the branding company is at stake when its brand ambassador is caught in rave parties. To sum up, for a sports-person to have a successful career and a good public image is necessary. Taking advantage of the privileges they are being offered, doesn’t allow them to misbehave in public as well as professionally. Such type of behaviour must be controlled as it may pose a negative impact
Athletes represent a popular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
figure and
are considered
role models for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
youths
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
individuals believe that; it is acceptable for the sports-person to behave
badly
at their will provided that they have a successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
career. This essay will
further
discuss the disagreement with the aforementioned statement.

It is crucial for any individual working in the field of entertainment to maintain its reputation. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they set an example for younger minds. When a sportsman or a sportswoman
is caught
using abusive words in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
, it implies that adopting such tactics are perks of success by the young generation.
For instance
, recently a renowned Indian cricket team captain
Possible spelling mistake found.
Virakt
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kohli
was captured
using an abusive word on-field. Such
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
should
be discouraged
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be considered
as a punishable
Possible spelling mistake. 'offence' is British English.
offence
by the cricket authorities.

Moreover
, it is
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
professional to establish a reputation off-field.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
sportsmen
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
are labelled
with the tag of drug abusers. There are examples of the Olympic players using steroids to increase their efficiency on the day of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
. Encouraging such shortcuts would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
a detrimental impact on the youths. When a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
individual associated with such drug abusive activities, it affects the brands they endorse. The reputation of the branding
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
is at stake when its brand ambassador
is caught
in rave parties.

To sum up, for a sports-person to have a successful career and a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
image is necessary. Taking advantage of the privileges they are
being offered
, doesn’t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
them to misbehave in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
as well
as
professionally
. Such type of
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be controlled
as it may pose a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
impact
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay The growing number of overweight people s putting a strain on the health care system in an effort to deal with the health issues involve. Some people that the best way to deal with this problem is to introduce more physical education lessons in school cur v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
279 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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