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The government should control the amount of violence in films and on television in order to decrease the violent crimes in society. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.4

The government should control the amount of violence in films and on television in order to decrease the violent crimes in society. v. 4
It is argued that authorities need to ban movies or TV programmes that show violent scenes or somehow limit their frequency of such scenes. This essay disagrees with this statement because freedom of expression is a fundamental human right accepted worldwide and there are other underlying reasons why people act violently. Firstly, films and other forms of entertainment should not be controlled by the government or any affiliated authority because that would affect the freedom of expression. However, most countries have adopted systems to rate movies clearly, so that viewers know what to expect and decide for themselves if they want to watch them, or if they allow their children to do so. For example, in my country, TV channels are also obligated by law to broadcast movies based on age ratings at different hours. Such practices do not contradict the freedom of speech, whereas those used by communist regimes, for example, that aim to control all forms of entertainment and not give people a choice. Secondly, shoving violence in movies, television or even video games is not the cause of high prevalence in violent crimes in society. Authorities recognise that problems such as poverty, lack of education or substance abuse have the greatest contribution in the elevated rates of violence. For instance, all citizens of a country watch the same TV programmes, but more violent offences happen in destitute areas. In conclusion, the government should not be responsible for controlling the media. Instead, they should concentrate more efforts to solve other social problems in order to reduce violence.
It
is argued
that authorities need to ban
movies
or TV
programmes
that
show
violent scenes or somehow limit their frequency of such scenes. This essay disagrees with this statement
because
freedom of expression is a fundamental human right
accepted
worldwide and there are other underlying reasons why
people
act
violently
.

Firstly
, films and other forms of entertainment should not
be controlled
by the
government
or any affiliated authority
because
that would affect the freedom of expression.
However
, most countries have adopted systems to rate
movies
clearly
,
so
that viewers know what to
expect
and decide for themselves if they want to
watch
them, or if they
allow
their children to do
so
.
For example
, in my country, TV channels are
also
obligated by law to broadcast
movies
based on age ratings at
different
hours. Such practices do not contradict the freedom of speech, whereas those
used
by communist regimes,
for example
, that aim to control all forms of entertainment and not give
people
a choice.

Secondly
, shoving violence in
movies
, television or even video games is not the cause of high prevalence in violent crimes in society. Authorities
recognise
that problems such as poverty, lack of education or substance abuse have the greatest contribution in the elevated rates of violence.
For instance
, all citizens of a country
watch
the same TV
programmes
,
but
more violent
offences
happen in destitute areas.

In conclusion
, the
government
should not be responsible for controlling the media.
Instead
, they should concentrate more efforts to solve other social problems in order to
reduce
violence.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
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IELTS essay The government should control the amount of violence in films and on television in order to decrease the violent crimes in society. v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
259 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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