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The government prescribes six years of study for elementary education. Some private schools require seven years saying this gives the students more training and the competitive edge. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The government prescribes six years of study for elementary education. Some private schools require seven years saying this gives the students more training and the competitive edge. JVEme
It is every person’s right to have access to a good education. Elementary shapes every child before stepping into high school. Six years for elementary is what the government recommends, but some private institutions advise an extra year is needed to have a little more experience and preparedness. Most countries, including the Philippines, follow the six-year system. It has served well for the past years and is still practiced today. Some might think this is outdated but if the past years have proven anything, it is that students are doing just fine without an extra year. Additionally, making changes to the education system could drastically affect these children’s lives. High school seems scary and unfamiliar but nothing can ever prepare a child unless they go through it. Once they are inside their high school classrooms, the years they spent in elementary are insignificant. Edge and training are something they can learn within the six years. In my experience, I graduated elementary after 6 years. I definitely was nervous and unsure once I started high school, but I eventually adapted and excelled in the end. An additional year can benefit students to brace themselves for high school. Stepping into high school is horrifying. Additionally, an extra year means another year of tuition and school supplies to pay. This can be exhausting for parents who can barely pay for one school year’s tuition. Having the funds to pay for an extra year is not a privilege every family has. To illustrate, when the senior high school was added to the Philippine education system, it has, and continues to aggravate a lot of parents. Five years after its implementation, there is still ongoing debate on its significance in the real world. In conclusion, both choices have their pros and cons. Six years is the norm globally. Since this is widely accepted, making changes now is unnecessary. While the seventh year can help unprepared students, it also comes with more bills to pay. I believe the most important factor to consider is the student’s welfare. 7-year elementary should only be applied to students who really need and want it and not just be made mandatory for students who probably would not need it.
It is every person’s right to have access to a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
education.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Elementary
shapes every child
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
stepping into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. Six years for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elementary
is what the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
recommends,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
private institutions advise an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
is needed
to have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
more experience and preparedness.

Most countries, including the Philippines, follow the six-year system. It has served well for the past years and is
still
practiced
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
this
is outdated
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
if the past years have proven anything, it is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
fine without an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
.
Additionally
, making
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
to the education system could
drastically
affect these children’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
High
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
seems scary and unfamiliar
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
nothing can ever prepare a child unless they go through it. Once they are inside their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
classrooms, the years they spent in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elementary
are insignificant. Edge and training are something they can learn within the six years. In my experience, I graduated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elementary
after 6 years. I definitely was nervous and unsure once I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I
eventually
adapted and excelled in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
.

An additional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
can benefit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to brace themselves for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. Stepping into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
is horrifying.
Additionally
, an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
means another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
of tuition and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
supplies to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
. This can be exhausting for parents who can
barely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
for one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year’s
tuition. Having the funds to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
for an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
is not a privilege every family has. To illustrate, when the senior
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
to the Philippine education system, it has, and continues to aggravate
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
parents. Five years after its implementation, there is
still
ongoing debate on its significance in the real world.

In conclusion
, both choices have their pros and cons. Six years is the norm globally. Since this is
widely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
accepted
, making
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
is unnecessary. While the seventh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
unprepared
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
, it
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
with more bills to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
. I believe the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
factor to consider is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student’s
welfare.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
7-year
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elementary
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
be applied
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who
really
need and want it and not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
be made
mandatory for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who
probably
would not need it.
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IELTS essay The government prescribes six years of study for elementary education. Some private schools require seven years saying this gives the students more training and the competitive edge.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
369 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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