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The given pie charts illustrate daily computer usage in minutes between 2010 and 2015, measuring by ages Overall, people aged 21-30 spend more time during day in computer over this period.

The given pie charts illustrate daily computer usage in minutes between 2010 and 2015, measuring by ages Overall, people aged 21-30 spend more time during day in computer over this period. EweGL
The given pie charts illustrate daily computer usage in minutes between 2010 and 2015, measuring by ages Overall, people aged 21-30 spend more time during day in computer over this period. Using pf computer in every day is decreasing for people in all year only within for people whom 41-50 year old it doesn't concern Aged 21-30 year keeps leadership over 5-year period, in 2010 it accounted 235 while in 2015 year it fell dawn by 15 minutes. People aged 15-20 was in the second place in daily computer usage, it decreased to 120 from 220 during 5 year. For adults usage computer is decreased by 30 minuts in 2015 while 5 years ago it made up 90 minutes
The
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given
pie charts illustrate daily computer usage in minutes between 2010 and 2015, measuring by ages
Overall
,
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people
aged 21-30 spend more time during day in computer over this period. Using pf computer in every day is decreasing for
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people
in all
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year
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
within for
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people
whom 41-50
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year
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
it doesn't concern Aged 21-30
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year
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
leadership over
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
5-year
period, in 2010 it accounted 235 while in 2015
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year
it fell dawn by 15 minutes.
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People
aged 15-20 was in the second place in daily computer usage, it decreased to 120
Nonstandard phrase. Did you mean: "from 220 to 5"?
from 220 during 5
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year
. For adults usage computer
is decreased
by 30
Possible spelling mistake found.
minuts
in 2015 while 5 years ago it made up 90
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
minutes
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IELTS essay The given pie charts illustrate daily computer usage in minutes between 2010 and 2015, measuring by ages Overall, people aged 21-30 spend more time during day in computer over this period.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
118 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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