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The generation gap is one which cannot be bridged

The generation gap is one which cannot be bridged yGL8M
Every generation lives according to the norms and beliefs in their own time with their own system of values and views. And every side wants to uphold principles they believe in. Often, our parents refuse to admit that we have grown up and are capable of taking care of ourselves. As a result, sometimes youth do the exact opposite, making it a wall between generations. First, the time brings changes, new technologies, new lifestyles and new ways of thinking and behaving. With more life experience than younger family members, grandparents are uniquely poised to see that differences between generations can be positive for all those concerned. Secondly, it is argued that the mindset of people is something that is deeply rooted and it is difficult to accept something else than what they had been thought. For example, the difficulty that older people have with adapting to the modern technology is one illustration. At that time, young people typically lived and worknear their extended families, worshiped ancestor. Thus, the ignorance of the change is their first defence unless changing opinion. While with the advent of television and movies, young people were exposed to cultural influences alien to their own families and cultures. On the other hand, those who consider themselves being more flexible and adjustable believe that if people try, the gap between generations can be quite reduced and even insignificant to be ever mentioned. In addition, if only parents and children who love more, accepted and respected the good, useful experiences as knowledge from the other generation they are able to coexist without prejudices to each others. All in all, the relations among people are always complex, even in the same generation. The gap between may or may not be overcome, which depends on the people, if each generation is able to or unable to respect the other one. I would like to say we can have good relationships with our parents, but the generation gap as the phenomenon won’t absolutely disappear all over the world one day.
Every generation
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
according to the norms and beliefs in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
time with their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
system of values and views. And every side wants to uphold principles they believe in.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Often
, our parents refuse to admit that we have grown up and are capable of taking care of ourselves.
As a result
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
youth do the exact opposite, making it a wall between generations.

First
, the time brings
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
, new technologies, new lifestyles and new ways of thinking and behaving. With more life experience than younger family members, grandparents are
uniquely
poised to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that differences between generations can be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
for all those concerned.

Secondly
, it
is argued
that the mindset of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
is something
that is
deeply
rooted and it is difficult to accept something
Use "(else)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
else
than what they had been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
.
For example
, the difficulty that older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have with adapting to the modern technology is one illustration. At that time, young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
typically
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
worknear
their extended families, worshiped ancestor.
Thus
, the ignorance of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
is their
first
Possible spelling mistake. 'defence' is British English.
defence
unless changing opinion. While with the advent of television and movies, young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
were exposed
to cultural influences alien to their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
families and cultures.

On the other hand
, those who consider themselves being more flexible and adjustable
Did you mean "belief" (noun) instead of believe (verb)?
believe
that if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
try, the gap between generations can be quite
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
and even insignificant to be ever mentioned.
In addition
, if
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
parents and children who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
more,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
accepted
and respected the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
, useful experiences as knowledge from the other generation they are able to coexist without prejudices to each
The noun should be probably in the singular form: "other"?
others
.

All in all, the relations among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are always complex, even in the same generation. The gap between may or may not
be overcome
, which depends on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, if each generation is able to or unable to respect the other one. I would like to say we can have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
relationships with our parents,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the generation gap as the phenomenon won’t
absolutely
disappear all over the world one day.
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IELTS essay The generation gap is one which cannot be bridged

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
338 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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