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The environmental problems that today's world is facing are so great that there is little ordinary people can do to improve the situation. So government and large organizations should be responsible for reducing the amount of damage being done to the environment. The what extent so you agreed or disagree? v.3

The environmental problems that today's world is facing are so great that there is little ordinary people can do to improve the situation. So government and large organizations should be responsible for reducing the amount of damage being done to the environment. The what extent so you agreed or disagree? v. 3
All countries in the world are suffering from environmental crisis, which is exacerbating each year. In my view, individual effort is less significant in reducing such damages; hence, the government and private organisations should come forward to tackle this ever-increasing global warming and environmental degradation issues. Certainly, environmental damage is an intricate issue which primarily results from careless industrialisation. Factories release chemicals into the environment without any treatment. So, they are liable for such devastating environmental degradation and they should pay all the money to reinstate the environment. According to the World Economic Forum’s survey, industrial wastes are the key reason for the contemporary ecological collapse and it comprises 70% of the world’s pollutions. Moreover, pollution is not an issue for a single country, but it is creating havoc in all countries. As all countries are inextricably connected, no country can deny its duties to resolve the issue. While the iceberg in Antarctica melts, it increases the risks of floods in the lower sea-level countries like Bangladesh, Sri Lanka and the Maldives. Whereas 80% of global warming is happening due to the excessive fuel usages of the developed countries. Rich countries should reduce their fuel consumption to limit the global temperature rise so that other countries become free from any environment-related jeopardies. In conclusion, the intensity of the environmental damages has reached its peak, so the individual effort will not greatly impact on the reduction of this worldwide issue. In fact, large organizations and government should resolve the issue because they have most responsible for the damage and they the means to control it.
All
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
in the world are suffering from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
crisis, which is exacerbating each year. In my view, individual effort is less significant in reducing such damages;
hence
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
and private
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisations' is British English.
organisations
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
forward to tackle this ever-increasing global warming and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
degradation issues.

Certainly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
damage
is an intricate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
which
primarily
results from careless
Possible spelling mistake. 'industrialisation' is British English.
industrialisation
. Factories release chemicals into the environment without any treatment.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, they are liable for such devastating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
degradation and
they should pay all the money to reinstate the environment. According to the World Economic Forum’s survey, industrial wastes are the key reason for the contemporary ecological collapse and it comprises 70% of the world’s pollutions.

Moreover
, pollution is not an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
for a single
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is creating havoc in all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. As all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are
inextricably
connected, no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
can deny its duties to resolve the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
. While the iceberg in Antarctica melts, it increases the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
of floods in the lower sea-level
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
like Bangladesh, Sri Lanka and the Maldives.
“Whereas” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Whereas
80% of global warming is happening due to the excessive fuel usages of the developed
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countries
. Rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
their fuel consumption to limit the global temperature rise
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
become free from any environment-related
Possible spelling mistake found.
jeopardies
.

In conclusion
, the intensity of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
damages has reached its peak,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the individual effort will not
greatly
impact on the reduction of this worldwide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
. In fact, large
Do not mix variants of the same word ('organization' and 'organisation') within a single text.
organizations
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should resolve the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have most responsible for the
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
damage and
they the means to control it.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
21Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
Language is the road map of a culture. It tells you where its people come from and where they are going.
Rita Mae Brown

IELTS essay The environmental problems that today's world is facing are so great that there is little ordinary people can do to improve the situation. So government and large organizations should be responsible for reducing the amount of damage being done to the environment. The what extent so you agreed or disagree? v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
264 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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