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the entertainment that bring more different influences.

the entertainment that bring more different influences. oxgGg
There are opposing views about the entertainment that bring more different influences. While some people claim that movies and computer games are relaxing that are not harmful to humans, I would argue that it has a lot of bad effects so it should be controlled. There is a common belief that watching movies and playing games with violent genres will relax without harm. Firstly, many people think that doing it will help them reduce stress after school and work. This is because there are a lot of game apps, violent movies are thriving on social networks and have excited them. For example, young people today often play Lien Quan Mobile, and watch many movies with violent genres. Second, it is believed that showing children more movies about violence will help them develop a stronger mindset. It is claimed that doing so will help people to be bold and fearless. In contrast, I am of the opinion that they always have some danger, a huge influence when we approach. This is primarily because some people's consciousness is not good. For instance, students' exposure to games and watching violent films will lead to a decline in schoolwork and delay in school hours. Therefore, when we know how to approach it, it can create jobs that do not affect our lives. Another argument is that when approaching too much of the game will cost us money and time. This is due to the fact that some people don't understand money yet. There is evidence to show that people often use money to buy a game, buy a violent movie online. In conclusion, I acknowledge that it cannot be said that it will help relax without harm. I am of the opinion that there should be some control measures.
There are opposing views about the entertainment that bring more
different
influences. While
some
people
claim that
movies
and computer
games
are relaxing that are not harmful to humans, I would argue that it has
a lot of
bad
effects
so
it should
be controlled
.

There is a common belief that watching
movies
and playing
games
with
violent
genres will relax without harm.
Firstly
,
many
people
think
that doing it will
help
them
reduce
stress
after school and work. This is
because
there are
a lot of
game apps,
violent
movies
are thriving on social networks and have excited them.
For example
, young
people
today
often
play Lien
Quan
Mobile, and
watch
many
movies
with
violent
genres. Second, it
is believed
that showing children more
movies
about violence will
help
them develop a stronger mindset. It
is claimed
that doing
so
will
help
people
to be bold and fearless.

In contrast
, I am of the opinion that they always have
some
danger
, a huge influence when we approach. This is
primarily
because
some
people
's consciousness is not
good
.
For instance
, students' exposure to
games
and watching
violent
films will lead to a decline in schoolwork and delay in school hours.
Therefore
, when we know how to approach it, it can create jobs that do not affect our
lives
. Another argument is that when approaching too much of the game will cost us money and time.
This is due to the fact that
some
people
don't understand money
yet
. There is evidence to
show
that
people
often
use
money to
buy
a game,
buy
a
violent
movie
online.

In conclusion
, I acknowledge that it cannot
be said
that it will
help
relax without harm. I am of the opinion that there should be
some
control measures.
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IELTS essay the entertainment that bring more different influences.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
295 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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