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The elderly should live in a nursing home

The elderly should live in a nursing home LwW2R
Firstly, our family cannot deny to talk about duty of the son and daughter. With a family that is always by our side since we were small, our parents would always make time for us when we needed them even though they are busy with their work. We owe our parents time. So, when we were adult, we have to be responsible to our parents. For instance, we get so busy in our adult lives that we often forget to make time for them and at least call our parent to ask their health. Therefore, I am convinced that, the daughter and the son should be responsibility to be a care-giver to elderly people.
Firstly
, our family cannot deny to talk about duty of the son and daughter. With a family
that is
always by our side since we were
small
, our
parents
would always
make
time for us when we needed them
even though
they are busy with their work. We owe our
parents
time.
So
, when we were adult, we
have to
be responsible to our
parents
.
For instance
, we
get
so
busy in our adult
lives
that we
often
forget to
make
time for them and at least call our
parent
to ask their health.
Therefore
, I
am convinced
that, the daughter and the son should be responsibility to be a care-giver to elderly
people
.
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IELTS essay The elderly should live in a nursing home

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
114 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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