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the disappearance of nature creations such as flora and fauna in today life has endangered our habitats

the disappearance of nature creations such as flora and fauna in today life has endangered our habitats Q8jMy
There are many argue that the disappearance of nature creations such as flora and fauna in today life has endangered our habitats. However, other people acknowledge there are more urgent and pressing environmental issue. While I admit the seriousness of the loss of wildlife, natural disasters, global warming and pollution seem to be the biggest threats to humans. On the one side, it is undeniable that vegetation and zoology are at risks, by considering the increasing amount of extinct genuses in recent decades due to global warming and several environmental trouble. For instance, there are more than 3000 animals and 2500 plants became endangered species in 2012. There are some particular examples such as giant pandas, Asian elephants and snow leopards according to IUCN Red List. It has a negative impact on the food chains and biodiversity either. Moreover, the provision of food and groceries from cattle and fowl can put us in hazardous situation. On the other side, it can clearly be seen that, not only the occurence of global warming, but also disasters and pollution have always been a intimidation to this worsen Earth. First and foremost, global warming is the main reason causing ice melting and climate changes which lead to the loss of species. For example, polar bears are now suffering because of ice melting in Arctica. The second urgent issue is natural disasters such as floods, droughts, earthquakes and more which have occured in many nations and caused consequences to their life, national agriculture and industry. Pollution is also one of the problems that we should take care of as soon as possible. Water pollution causes thousands of marine creatures to death; land pollution and air pollution causes diseases on human's well-being: cancer, lung capacities and so on. To summary, there are hundreds of cases who are suffering from environmental problem. That means we should stop harming our Earth and save this precious planet before it is too late.
There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
argue that the disappearance of nature creations such as flora and fauna in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
life has endangered our habitats.
However
, other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
acknowledge there are more urgent and pressing environmental issue. While I admit the seriousness of the loss of wildlife, natural disasters,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
warming
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
seem to be the biggest threats to humans.

On the one side, it is undeniable that vegetation and zoology are at
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
, by considering the increasing amount of extinct
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "genera", the plural form of the noun 'genus'?
genuses
in recent decades due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
warming
and several environmental trouble.
For instance
, there are more than 3000 animals and 2500 plants became endangered species in 2012. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
particular examples such as giant pandas, Asian elephants and snow leopards according to
Possible spelling mistake found.
IUCN
Red List. It has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on the food chains and biodiversity either.
Moreover
, the provision of food and groceries from cattle and fowl can put us in hazardous situation.

On the other side, it can
clearly
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the
Possible spelling mistake found.
occurence
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
warming
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
disasters and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
have always been
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
intimidation to this worsen Earth.
First
and foremost,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
warming
is the main reason causing ice melting and climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
which lead to the loss of species.
For example
, polar bears are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
suffering
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of ice melting in Arctica. The second urgent issue is natural disasters such as floods, droughts, earthquakes and more which have
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "occurred", the past tense form of the verb 'occur'?
occured
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
nations and caused
The usual preposition to use after "consequences" is not "to". Did you mean "consequences of", "consequences for", or "consequences on"?
consequences to
their life, national agriculture and industry.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Pollution
is
also
one of the problems that we should take care of as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as possible. Water
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
causes thousands of marine creatures to death; land
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
and air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
causes diseases on human's well-being: cancer, lung capacities and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.

To summary, there are hundreds of cases who are suffering from environmental problem. That means we should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
harming our Earth and save this precious planet
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
it is too late.
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IELTS essay the disappearance of nature creations such as flora and fauna in today life has endangered our habitats

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
324 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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