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The charts below show local government expenditure in 2010 and 2015 Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant v.1

The charts below show local government expenditure in 2010 and 2015
In today's world overweight is the biggest health concern, especially among the children. And, obesity is the reason behind many life threatening conditions in the majority of people around the world. I am going to explain the possible reason and what we can do to solve these reasons in the upcoming paragraphs. To begin with, the first and foremost cause of obesity is the sedentary lifestyle of human beings. In addition to this, due to the advancement of technology people prefer to sit in front of their computer to do everything. For instance, most of the software engineers who work for the big companies, or who are in senior positions prefer to work from home, instead of going to the offices physically. Consequently, people are sitting in one position for eight to nine hours straight with minimal or no physical activities end up being obese at suffer through some major health issues like heart diseases, high blood pressure and cholesterol. Likewise, the majority of youngsters are overweight, because the internet has replaced the outdoor games with the virtual games. To tackle these problems, as humans, it is our duty to take care of our body. First, if people prefer to work from home, we can encourage them to go to the gym or do workout either in the morning before work or evening after work, also tell them to eat small frequent balanced meals. So, that they cannot go overnight and lives a healthy life. On the other hand, for youngsters we can encourage them to play outdoor games like basketball, football. As a result, they will going to have a healthy future ahead. To sum up, we have to treat our bodies as temples. Just like books are food for our brains, similarly a balanced diet and good amount of workout keeps are bodies fit.
In
today
's world overweight is the biggest health concern,
especially
among the children. And, obesity is the reason behind
many
life threatening conditions in the majority of
people
around the world. I am going to
explain
the possible reason and what we can do to solve these reasons in the upcoming paragraphs.

To
begin
with, the
first
and foremost cause of obesity is the sedentary lifestyle of human beings.
In addition
to this, due to the advancement of technology
people
prefer to sit in front of their computer to do everything.
For instance
, most of the software engineers who
work
for the
big
companies
, or who are in senior positions prefer to
work
from home,
instead
of going to the offices
physically
.
Consequently
,
people
are sitting in one position for eight to nine hours straight with minimal or no physical activities
end
up being obese at suffer through
some
major health issues like heart diseases, high blood pressure and cholesterol.
Likewise
, the majority of youngsters are overweight,
because
the internet has replaced the outdoor games with the virtual games.

To tackle these problems, as humans, it is our duty to take care of our body.
First
, if
people
prefer to
work
from home, we can encourage them to go to the gym or do workout either in the morning
before
work
or evening after
work
,
also
tell
them to eat
small
frequent balanced meals.
So
, that they cannot go overnight and
lives
a healthy life.
On the other hand
, for youngsters we can encourage them to play outdoor games like basketball, football.
As a result
, they will
going
to have a healthy future ahead.

To sum up, we
have to
treat our bodies as temples.
Just
like books are food for our brains,
similarly
a balanced diet and
good
amount of workout
keeps
are bodies fit.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
You live a new life for every new language you speak. If you know only one language, you live only once.
Czech Proverb

IELTS essay The charts below show local government expenditure in 2010 and 2015

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
306 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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