Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The benefit(s) of non-academic subjects such as sports and music

The benefit(s) of non-academic subjects such as sports and music 2rA2j
It is beneficial for students to learning non-academic subjects. To begin with, extra-curricular education helps fully develop learners’ characters. This is because these subjects equip students with good morals before being faced with real-life situations. In addition, non-academic subjects give students some entertaining moments after intense classes. As a result, it enables schoolchildren to perform more effectively in the next academic class. For instance, students attending a music session can easily relieve stress and prepare a clear mind for later sections just by listening and singing along to favorite songs
It is beneficial for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to learning non-academic subjects. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, extra-curricular education
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
fully
develop learners’ characters. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
these subjects equip
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
morals
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
being faced
with real-life situations.
In addition
, non-academic subjects give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
entertaining moments after intense classes.
As a result
, it enables schoolchildren to perform more
effectively
in the
next
academic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
attending a music session can
easily
relieve
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and prepare a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
mind for later sections
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
by listening and singing along to favorite
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
songs

IELTS essay The benefit(s) of non-academic subjects such as sports and music

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
89 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • The benefit(s) of non-academic subjects such as sports and music