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The amount of Sport shown on television every week has increased significantly and this is having an impact on live sports events. Do you thik the benefits of having more televised sports are greater than the disadvantages

The amount of Sport shown on television every week has increased significantly and this is having an impact on live sports events. Do you thik the benefits of having more televised sports are greater than the disadvantages kpPe
Nowdays, we can see, the quality of sport programme which shown on TV has risen sharply and obviously, weekly. Besides this having an affect on direct sports programme. It has several advantages and disadavantages. One obvious advantage of this issue is that, The great variety of sport shown on TV. What is meaning? It means, we can see much more programmes that based on sport show that live sports events. why? Since most of these programmes are recorded before in the other word, they are previously recorded and collected by whom? By somebody whom we know it as director or TV channel manager. Secondly, the other advantage is that you can make a close - up of player. Thirtly, the final advantage is flexible timing how is important? As show is playing lively, you cannot have slow-motion scene during playing the show. How exciting is! you can duble check or revision the programme as moreover as possible. It is a greatest advantage, isnot it? For instance in one of the FIFA world cup 2014 matches which was holding in the Bluehorizenteh city in Brazil, between Iran and Argentina national football teams, one of defender players of Argentina national football team committed a foul inside the penalty area on Iranian forward, Ashkan Dejagah. However, the refer refused to take penalty kick for Iran. Why? just because of lack of video check or VAR. On the contarary, this issue has too disadavantages; Firstly it is fewer at live matches. Secondly, that is, high tickets costs. Why? nobody knows it. It is a mysterious problem. Thirtly and finally, it is a big problem and huge concern for smaller club. Why? because of less number and amounts of fans who have to encourage their clubs or teams. How? By going to stadium or buying TV playing ticket cards. In brief, It has many advantages and disadvantages. But in my opinion, the scale of advantages is much more weighted than disadvantages.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Nowdays
, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
, the quality of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
Possible spelling mistake. 'programme' is British English.
programme
which shown on TV has risen
sharply
and
obviously
, weekly.
Besides
this having an
Did you mean "effect"?
affect
on direct
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
Possible spelling mistake. 'programme' is British English.
programme
. It has several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
disadavantages
.

One obvious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantage
of this issue is that, The great variety of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
shown on TV. What
The verb 'meaning' is a stative verb and sometimes the progressive form is not correct. Try a simple form instead.
is meaning
? It means, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
much more
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
that based on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
why
? Since most of these
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
are recorded
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
in the other word, they are previously recorded and collected by whom? By somebody whom we know it as director or TV channel manager.
Secondly
, the other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantage
is that you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a close
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
up of player.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Thirtly
, the final
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantage
is flexible timing how is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
? As
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
is playing lively, you cannot have slow-motion scene during playing the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
. How exciting is!
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
you
can
Possible spelling mistake found.
duble
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
or revision the
Possible spelling mistake. 'programme' is British English.
programme
as
moreover
as possible. It is
Use "the" with the superlative.
a
greatest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantage
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
isnot
it?
For instance
in one of the
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
FIFA world cup
2014 matches which was holding in the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Bluehorizenteh
city in Brazil, between Iran and Argentina national football teams, one of defender players of Argentina national football team committed a foul inside the penalty area on Iranian forward,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Ashkan
Possible spelling mistake found.
Dejagah
.
However
,
After 'the', do not use a verb. Make sure that the spelling of 'refer' is correct. If 'refer' is the first word in a compound adjective, use a hyphen between the two words. Note: This error message can occur if you use a verb as a noun, and the word is not a noun in standard English.
the refer
refused to take penalty kick for Iran. Why?
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
just
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of lack of video
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
or VAR. On the
Possible spelling mistake found.
contarary
, this issue has too
Possible spelling mistake found.
disadavantages
;
Firstly
it is fewer at
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
matches.
Secondly
,
that is
, high tickets costs. Why?
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
nobody
knows it. It is a mysterious problem.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Thirtly
and
finally
, it is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
problem and huge concern for smaller club. Why?
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
because
of less number and amounts of fans who
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
encourage their clubs or teams. How? By going to stadium or buying TV playing ticket cards.

In brief
, It has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
and disadvantages.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
in my opinion, the scale of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
is much more weighted than disadvantages.
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IELTS essay The amount of Sport shown on television every week has increased significantly and this is having an impact on live sports events. Do you thik the benefits of having more televised sports are greater than the disadvantages

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
326 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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