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DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE THAT IT IS ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE FOR WOMEN TO HAVE A SUCCESSFULL CAREER AS WELL AS HAVING THE FILL RESPONSIBILITY OF RAISING A FAMILY

THAT IT IS ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE FOR WOMEN TO HAVE A SUCCESSFULL CAREER AS WELL AS HAVING THE FILL RESPONSIBILITY OF RAISING A FAMILY L39OK
IN OUR SOCIETY MANY WOMEN HAVE AN ABUNDANT CAREER IN HER JOB, WHILE HAVING A FULL RESPOSIBILITY AS A MOTHER AND WIFE IN THEIR FAMILY. THEY CAN TAKE GOOD CARE FOR THEIR FAMILY EVEN THEY ARE BUSY IN THEIR WORK. ALL THE LADY ARE MULTI-TASKING, THEY CAN DO WHAT SHE WANT IN HER CAREER. SHE PROBABLY HAD TECHNICS HOW TO HANDLE HER JOB AS WELL AS FULL RESPONSIBLE IN THEIR FAMILY. ALL LADIES ARE HAPPY IF SHE HAD A OWN JOB BECAUSE THEY CAN BUY WANT SHE WANT AND FOR HER FAMILY. THEY CAN FEED HER FAMILY WITH OR WITHOUT ANY HELP FROM OTHERS. ALL THIS TIME, WE HAD A MODERN TECHNOLOGIES, LIKE INTERNET AND GADGETS, WE HAD EASY CONNECTED WITH OTHERS AND FAMILIES. MANY COMPANIES HAD A WORK FROM HOME, FOR THEIR EMPLOYEES, SO THAT THEY CAN STAY AT HOME WHILE HAVING A JOB AS THE SAME TIME, THEY CAN MONITOR WHAT HAPPENING IN HER FAMILY. IN MY OPINION, IT'S GREAT OPPORTUNITY IF THE WOMEN HAD A CAREER AND HAVING RESPONSINBILITY FOR HER FAMILY, BECAUSE THEY CAN SEE WHAT HAPPENING IN HER FAMILY. SHE CAN HANDLE HER FAMILY. ALL WOMEN ARE HAPPY THAT SHE ARE CARRYING FOR THEIR FAMILY.
IN OUR SOCIETY
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
MANY
WOMEN HAVE AN ABUNDANT CAREER IN HER
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
JOB
, WHILE HAVING A FULL
Possible spelling mistake found.
RESPOSIBILITY
AS A MOTHER AND WIFE IN THEIR
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
FAMILY
. THEY CAN TAKE
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
GOOD
CARE FOR THEIR
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
FAMILY
EVEN THEY ARE BUSY IN THEIR WORK. ALL THE LADY ARE MULTI-TASKING, THEY CAN DO WHAT SHE
The pronoun 'SHE' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "wants", "wanted".
WANT
IN HER CAREER. SHE
PROBABLY
HAD
Possible spelling mistake found.
TECHNICS
HOW TO HANDLE HER
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
JOB
AS WELL
AS FULL RESPONSIBLE IN THEIR
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
FAMILY
. ALL LADIES ARE HAPPY IF SHE HAD A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
OWN
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
JOB
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
BECAUSE
THEY CAN
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
BUY
WANT SHE
The pronoun 'SHE' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "wants", "wanted".
WANT
AND FOR HER
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
FAMILY
. THEY CAN FEED HER
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
FAMILY
WITH OR WITHOUT ANY
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
HELP
FROM OTHERS. ALL THIS TIME, WE HAD A MODERN
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "technology"?
TECHNOLOGIES
, LIKE INTERNET AND GADGETS, WE HAD EASY CONNECTED WITH OTHERS AND
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
FAMILIES
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
MANY
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
COMPANIES
HAD A WORK FROM HOME, FOR THEIR EMPLOYEES,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
SO
THAT THEY CAN STAY AT HOME WHILE HAVING A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
JOB
AS THE SAME TIME, THEY CAN MONITOR WHAT HAPPENING IN HER
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
FAMILY
. IN MY OPINION,
Did you mean "its GREAT OPPORTUNITY"?
IT'S GREAT OPPORTUNITY
IF THE WOMEN HAD A CAREER AND HAVING
Possible spelling mistake found.
RESPONSINBILITY
FOR HER
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
FAMILY
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
BECAUSE
THEY CAN
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
SEE
WHAT HAPPENING IN HER
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
FAMILY
. SHE CAN HANDLE HER
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
FAMILY
. ALL WOMEN ARE HAPPY THAT SHE ARE CARRYING FOR THEIR
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
FAMILY
.
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IELTS essay THAT IT IS ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE FOR WOMEN TO HAVE A SUCCESSFULL CAREER AS WELL AS HAVING THE FILL RESPONSIBILITY OF RAISING A FAMILY

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
200 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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