Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Tell a story about a time when you had an incident / problem

Tell a story about a time when you had an incident / problem 1maR7
It happened in the year I was in 4th grade. Like any normal day, I returned home after stressful hours in class. I usually just glance to cross the street, but today I pulled over carefully to the other side of the road. However, out of nowhere, a motorbike came and I fell down. But luckily it's close to my house. At that time, people called my mother and she took me to the hospital. Half a month later I was discharged from the hospital and went back to school, but my mother still had to drive me because my leg was still very painful.
It happened in the year I was in 4th grade. Like any normal day, I returned home after stressful hours in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
. I
usually
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
glance to cross the street,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
I pulled over
carefully
to the other side of the road.
However
, out of nowhere, a motorbike came and I fell down.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
luckily it's close to my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
. At that time,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
called my
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
mother and
she took me to the hospital. Half a month later I
was discharged
from the hospital and went back to school,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
my mother
still
had to drive me
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
my leg was
still
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
painful.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Tell a story about a time when you had an incident / problem

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
105 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • Tell a story about a time when you had an incident / problem