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Television Sport shows such as the Olympics are a good source of motivation for our youths who do not like to exercise much. Do you agree or disagree? v.1

Television Sport shows such as the Olympics are a good source of motivation for our youths who do not like to exercise much. v. 1
Nowadays, many sport events have been broadcasted electronically and have greatly inspired the younger generation to exercise. In my opinion, I believe that the statement is true due to the two main reasons which will be discussed further in the following essay. To start with, watching sport shows enable their understanding towards the game, which eventually will increase their interest. Stephen Curry, for instance, the 5-times winner in 'All-Year Basketball Championship' was first intrigued by watching NBA in his house during his high school year. This then lead him to do more research towards the game and practiced on daily basis, which has brought him to what he is today. Therefore, watching sports through the television can increase the children's interest to do the sport activity. In addition, it allows the offspring to be motivated by wanting to become the person who represents the nation. In 2017, researchers discovered that 85% of the students in the 'Indian Wrestler Olympics' were once inspired by Geeta Phogat, the first Olympian to win a gold for India. Her game was repeatedly broadcasted across the country and was celebrated for 30 days straight. Due to this, many children have became inspired by her and followed her path. Hence, watching sport activities electronically allows the offspring to be inspired by the representative within the game and to exercise. To conclude, television sport events have indeed inspired many children to exercise. In my opinion, the show still needs to be broadcasted widely in order to increase the interest of the children towards the game and allow them to be inspired by the nation's representatives, which eventually will motivate them to exercise.
Nowadays,
many
sport
events
have
been broadcasted
electronically
and have
greatly
inspired the younger generation to exercise. In my opinion, I believe that the statement is true due to the two main reasons which will
be discussed
further
in the following essay.

To
start
with, watching
sport
shows
enable their understanding towards the game, which
eventually
will increase their interest. Stephen Curry,
for instance
, the 5-times winner in 'All-Year Basketball Championship' was
first
intrigued by watching NBA in his
house
during his high school year. This then lead him to do more research towards the game and practiced on daily basis, which has brought him to what he is
today
.
Therefore
, watching
sports
through the television can increase the children's interest to do the
sport
activity.

In addition
, it
allows
the offspring to
be motivated
by wanting to become the person who represents the nation. In 2017, researchers discovered that 85% of the students in the 'Indian Wrestler Olympics' were once inspired by
Geeta
Phogat
, the
first
Olympian to win a gold for India. Her game was
repeatedly
broadcasted across the country and
was celebrated
for 30 days straight. Due to this,
many
children have became inspired by her and followed her path.
Hence
, watching
sport
activities
electronically
allows
the offspring to
be inspired
by the representative within the game and to exercise.

To conclude
, television
sport
events
have
indeed
inspired
many
children to exercise. In my opinion, the
show
still
needs to
be broadcasted
widely
in order to increase the interest of the children towards the game and
allow
them to
be inspired
by the nation's representatives, which
eventually
will motivate them to exercise.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Television Sport shows such as the Olympics are a good source of motivation for our youths who do not like to exercise much. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
275 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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