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Technology is destroying social interaction. To what extend do you agree?

Technology is destroying social interaction. g80El
It is not a stretch to say that technology become a momentous part of mankind's lives. It has innovated every aspect. However, there are still some arguments that creations like computers, smartphones are ruining the connection between people. From my point of view, I refuse this statement Inventions like laptops, iPhones mark a new step forward in human history. In the early day, most individuals used hand-writing letters or landlines to transfer information to others. This was common long-distance telecommunication. However, it might be costed excessively. Consequently, there would be short of cash. On contrary, the mobile phone is such a great tool to replace the old. People effortlessly interact with partners as far away by using face-to-face applications like Messenger, Instagram, Twitter. Unlike before, numerous people are enabled to join in a meeting containing more than 300, so that members simply exchange ideas, contents, and advice to others. Thus, a healthy social network is grown among user Furthermore, technology is an efficient device for education. For instance, taking an online course far away from individuals' location is better than taking public transportation or using your vehicle to the class. Besides, pupils and students easily interact through a screen, gain plenty of information for improving their learning via Teams, Google Meet, Zoom, which contain more than 500 members. To an introvert, technology is a boon. They are capable of contacting the community without facing social anxiety at any cost To sum up everything, I assert that technology is the best tool to increase social interaction. However, the purpose of technology is always being affected harmfully due to a dearth of awareness. Be wise in using technology to become a healthy user.
It is not a stretch to say that
technology
become a momentous part of mankind's
lives
. It has innovated every aspect.
However
, there are
still
some
arguments that creations like computers, smartphones are ruining the
connection between
people
. From my point of view, I refuse this statement

Inventions like laptops, iPhones mark a new step forward in human history. In the early day, most individuals
used
hand-writing letters or landlines to transfer information to others. This was common long-distance telecommunication.
However
, it might
be costed
excessively
.
Consequently
, there would be short of cash. On contrary, the mobile phone is such a great tool to replace the
old
.
People
effortlessly
interact with partners as far away by using face-to-face applications like Messenger, Instagram, Twitter. Unlike
before
, numerous
people
are enabled
to
join
in a meeting containing more than 300,
so
that members
simply
exchange
ideas
, contents, and advice to others.
Thus
, a healthy social network
is grown
among user

Furthermore
,
technology
is an efficient device for education.
For instance
, taking an online course far away from individuals' location is better than taking public transportation or using your vehicle to the
class
.
Besides
, pupils and students
easily
interact through a screen, gain
plenty
of information for improving their learning via Teams, Google
Meet
, Zoom, which contain more than 500 members. To an introvert,
technology
is a boon. They are capable of contacting the community without facing social anxiety at any cost

To sum up everything, I assert that
technology
is the best tool to increase social interaction.
However
, the purpose of
technology
is always being
affected
harmfully
due to a dearth of awareness. Be wise in using
technology
to become a healthy user.
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IELTS essay Technology is destroying social interaction.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
281 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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