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many people are working longer hours. What are the causes and effects.

many people are working longer hours. What are the causes and effects. 9YkM0
In this modern era, working longer hours is a topic of public interest and concern. There are a lot of reasons for this situation, and it can cause some negative effects. The main reason is that the requirement of living is higher than in the past, so the employees not only work for longer hours to pay for high living standards, but they also work harder because of the competitiveness. It cannot be denied that technology is developing to satisfy people and make life is more convenient, and most of them have high prices combined with the cost of living being higher than in the past. As a result, people have to work longer hours to earn money to afford them. Moreover, because of the high unemployment rate in recent years, people have to compete to find a job. Working overtime is a way to display their enthusiasm and leave a good impression on the employers. Therefore, the employees work longer to express themselves to have job and promotion opportunities. The most serious problem is that neither health nor relationship can be affected by working overtime for a long duration. Obviously, the worker who works long hours can have a lot of chronic diseases due to the lack of sleep and lack of exercise such as obesity or diabetes, and sleeplessness can make them feel tired, they cannot focus on the job lead to the efficiency can reduce. When workers work too hard, they do not have much time to relax leads to stress, and if it exists for a long time, people tend to have a problem in inner or commit suicide. Furthermore, because employees spend a lot of time working, they can ignore the relationship outside, such as family, friends, and romantic partners, they no longer have time to build new relationships and maintain the existing ones make them feel lonely after that. In conclusion, competitiveness and high living standard are the main reasons for working longer hours, and they cause many health problems and negative effects on relationships.
In this modern era,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
longer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
is a topic of public interest and concern. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
reasons for this situation, and it can cause
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects.

The main reason is that the requirement of
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living
is higher than in the past,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the employees not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
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work
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
longer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
to pay for
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high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
standards,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they
also
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work
harder
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the competitiveness. It cannot
be denied
that technology is developing to satisfy
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people
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
life is more convenient, and most of them have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
prices combined with the cost of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
being higher than in the past.
As a result
,
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people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
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work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
longer
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hours
to earn money to afford them.
Moreover
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the
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high
unemployment rate in recent years,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
compete to find a job.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Working
overtime is a way to display their enthusiasm and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
impression on the employers.
Therefore
, the employees
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
longer
to express themselves to have job and promotion opportunities.

The most serious problem is that neither health nor
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relationship
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
by
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working
overtime for a long duration.
Obviously
, the worker who works long
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hours
can have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
chronic diseases due to the lack of sleep and lack of exercise such as obesity or diabetes, and sleeplessness can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them feel tired, they cannot focus on the job lead to the efficiency can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
. When workers
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work
too
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
, they do not have much
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time
to relax leads to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
, and if it exists for a long
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time
,
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people
tend to have a problem in inner or commit suicide.
Furthermore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
employees spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
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time
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working
, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationship
outside, such as family, friends, and romantic partners, they no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
longer
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to build new
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relationships
and maintain the existing ones
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them feel lonely after that.

In conclusion
, competitiveness and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
standard are the main reasons for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
longer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
, and they cause
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
health problems and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationships
.
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IELTS essay many people are working longer hours. What are the causes and effects.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
341 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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