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Technology has developed rapidly over the past few decades.

Technology has developed rapidly over the past few decades. l79NX
Technology has developed rapidly over the past few decades. Consequently, numerous people believe that subjects such as Science and Technology are more important than History in school nowadays, while others say History is the most important lesson. This essay will examine both sides of the views and my own opinions. On the one hand, humans have existed since prehistoric times. At the beginning of the period, nothing was the same as what we have now. History introduces the evolution that has made the world become what it is now. It is crucial to know the names of people who have contributed a huge development to society. In addition, students also can learn about the significant events that happened in the past, such as wars. These are some of the importance of History. On the other hand, learning about Science and Technology can be extremely useful nowadays. Modern developments have made our lives decidedly convenient and comfortable. Electronic gadgets have become an essential part of our lives. On top of that, people can use this knowledge to invent new products, while history is only a kind of theory and is fairly useless when it comes to career opportunities. For instance, undergraduates majoring in computer science can easily find a high salary occupation, where students majoring in history are struggling with living. There are the benefits of learning subjects like Science. As far as I am concerned, Science and Technology are miles more significant than History when it comes to school subjects as they can give teenagers more opportunities in the future, despite the fact that History is also vital. To conclude, History is important since it tells us about the past, whereas not only can Science and Technology teach us knowledge about modern technology, but they can also let us devise new products.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Technology
has developed
rapidly
over the past few decades.
Consequently
, numerous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that subjects such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Science
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Technology
are more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
in school nowadays, while others say
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
is the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
lesson. This essay will examine both sides of the views and my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
opinions.

On the one hand, humans have existed since prehistoric times. At the beginning of the period, nothing was the same as what we have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
introduces the evolution that has made the world become what it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
. It is crucial to know the names of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who have contributed a huge development to society.
In addition
, students
also
can learn about the significant
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
that happened in the past, such as wars. These are
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
importance of History.

On the other hand
, learning about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Science
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Technology
can be
extremely
useful nowadays. Modern developments have made our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
decidedly
convenient and comfortable. Electronic gadgets have become an essential part of our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
On top of that
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
this knowledge to invent new products, while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a kind of theory and is
fairly
useless when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to career opportunities.
For instance
, undergraduates majoring in computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
can
easily
find a high salary occupation, where students majoring in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
are struggling with living. There are the benefits of learning subjects like Science.

As far as I
am concerned
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Science
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Technology
are miles more significant than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to school subjects as they can give
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
more opportunities in the future, despite the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
is
also
vital.

To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
since it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tells
us about the past, whereas not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Science
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Technology
teach us knowledge about modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they can
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
us devise new products.
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IELTS essay Technology has developed rapidly over the past few decades.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
302 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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