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Technology has a largely positive impact on families

Technology has a largely positive impact on families XoXKN
Technology has a important role in 21st century. People’s lives are surrounded technology which make our life easy. Firstly I can say that technology has a positive impact on families because it is a way to spend together free time, we can do this when we watch television, play interesting games, sing karaoke. Secondly technology allow talking together when we are in different places, country we can see our relatives through platforms like viber, whatsapp, we can use camera. We can do this activity on mobile phone, tablets, computers. On the other hand many families have access to information and this access can do people more informed which help in many family troubles. In conclusion, I belive that technology make more interesting our life and easy because if you need a cup of coffee you can get easy with the help coffee machine or you need it right away clean clothes you can get with the help washing machine.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Technology
has
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in 21st century.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
are surrounded
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
our life easy.

Firstly
I can say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impact on families
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is a way to spend together free time, we can do this when we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
television, play interesting games, sing karaoke.

Secondly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
talking together when we are in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
places, country we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
our relatives through platforms like
Possible spelling mistake found.
viber
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
whatsapp
, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
camera. We can do this activity on mobile phone, tablets, computers.

On the other hand
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
families have access to information and this access can do
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
more informed which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
family troubles.

In conclusion
,
Did you mean "I believe"?
I belive
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
more interesting our life and easy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
if you need a cup of coffee you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
easy with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
coffee machine or you need it right away clean clothes you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
washing machine.

IELTS essay Technology has a largely positive impact on families

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
159 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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