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Technology and modern life

Technology and modern life gbBL7
Information may now be accessed and exchanged quickly and uncontrollably because of modern technology. Despite all benefits, some believe that is harmful and dangerous for our societies. To a certain point I agree that it could be hazardous, but if we have proper control over technological usages it would be beneficial from various aspects. On one hand, the evolution of technology is beneficial to humans. With the help of advancement in technology, it has allowed people to gain access to various websites and information hubs etc. Almost every company is using technology to store and maintain their confidential information these days. Some people believe that this development can be hazardous for our societies as it could be misused for various crime activities. For instance, a hacker might have access to bank information of someone and use that person's and use his/her credit card. Despite all the threats we cannot neglect the benefits we are getting from modern technological advancement to humankind. Firstly, the most important and positive effect of technology on our lives is because of advancement in the medical field. The development of any country is measured from the health of its citizens. The invention of X-Rays, CT-Scan etc are commendable achievements of scientists. These inventions are helpful to cure many diseases like asthma, diabetes. cancer etc. Secondly, with easy access to information systems, it is also helpful for students to learn new things from various learning platforms such as Youtube, Byju's and so on. In conclusion, to a certain extent I would agree that easy access to various information can be harmful to humankind. However, I also believe that this development brings a lot of benefits especially to scientists as they have become more effective in doing their research. I personally believe that governments should have strict rules and regulations and proper control systems to prevent the misuse of information
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Information
may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
be accessed
and exchanged
quickly
and
uncontrollably
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
. Despite all benefits,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that is
harmful and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
for our societies. To a certain point I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that it could be hazardous,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
if we have proper control over technological usages it would be beneficial from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
aspects.

On one hand, the evolution of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
is beneficial to humans. With the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of advancement in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
, it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to gain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
websites and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
hubs etc. Almost every
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
is using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
to store and maintain their confidential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
these days.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that this development can be hazardous for our societies as it could
be misused
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
crime activities.
For instance
, a hacker might have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
to bank
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
of someone and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
that person's and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
his/her credit card.

Despite all the threats we cannot neglect the benefits we are getting from modern technological advancement to humankind.
Firstly
, the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effect of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
on our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of advancement in the medical field. The development of any country
is measured
from the health of its citizens. The invention of X-Rays, CT-Scan etc are commendable achievements of scientists. These inventions are helpful to cure
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
diseases like asthma, diabetes.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
cancer
etc.
Secondly
, with easy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
systems, it is
also
helpful for students to learn new things from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
learning platforms such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
Youtube
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Byju
's and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.

In conclusion
, to a certain extent I would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that easy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
can be harmful to humankind.
However
, I
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that this development brings
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
benefits
especially
to scientists as they have become more effective in doing their research. I
personally
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
should have strict
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulations and proper control systems to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
the misuse of
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
information
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IELTS essay Technology and modern life

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
311 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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