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Medical service should not be free anyone regardless of the income. What extent do you agree or disagree

Medical service should not be free anyone regardless of the income. What extent RVE18
Health has always been an essential part of a person. Some say that health care should not be free for anyone regardless of what financial background they are from. However, I am not of the opinion and give some reasons to support my idea. Firstly, restrictions to free medication cannot be a sensible measure. This is mainly because it is not always people's fault get sick as many patients could fall victim to various desease by traffic accidents or get injured while getting engaged in government section. For instance, police forces or military staff may get wounded frequently during their job when guarding the security. Additionally, there are many citizens who are not capable of paying the healthcare bills like older people, the disabled. If this disadvantaged class could not have an access to free medical services it may result in adverse consequences. As a result, not only the people and society may suffer but current government also can encounter serous troubles. Secondly, it is undoubtedly true that people are forced to pay taxes to the state from their income and they have a right to enjoy medical service as the government establish hospitals and provide medics with salaries according to the budget that gathered by tax payers. Furthermore, free medical care may improve the work efficiency as giving healthy and fit employees who are regulary checked. For example, pilots, teachers and military forces can be more beneficial if they have no troubles with their body. In conclusion, removing mecidal service from the system is not a wise solution as it benefits both the country and their citizens as a whole.
Health has always been an essential part of a person.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
say that health care should not be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
for anyone regardless of what financial background they are from.
However
, I am not of the opinion and give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons to support my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
.

Firstly
, restrictions to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
medication cannot be a sensible measure. This is
mainly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is not always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's fault
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
sick as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
patients could fall victim to various
Possible spelling mistake found.
desease
by traffic accidents or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
injured while getting engaged in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
section.
For instance
, police forces or military staff may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
wounded
frequently
during their job when guarding the security.
Additionally
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
citizens who are not capable of paying the healthcare bills like older
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, the disabled.
“If” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
If
this disadvantaged
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
could not have
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "access".
an access
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
medical services it may result in adverse consequences.
As a result
, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and society may suffer
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
also
can encounter serous troubles.

Secondly
, it is
undoubtedly
true that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are forced
to pay taxes to the state from their
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
income and
they have a right to enjoy medical service as the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
establish hospitals and provide medics with salaries according to the budget that gathered by tax payers.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
medical care may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the work efficiency as giving healthy and fit employees who are
Possible spelling mistake found.
regulary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
checked
.
For example
, pilots, teachers and military forces can be more beneficial if they have no troubles with their body.

In conclusion
, removing
Possible spelling mistake found.
mecidal
service from the system is not a wise solution as it benefits both the country and their citizens as a whole.
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IELTS essay Medical service should not be free anyone regardless of the income. What extent

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
271 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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